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submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by WithoutFurtherBelay@hexbear.net to c/self_improvement@hexbear.net

Now that I’ve caught you with the clickbait title,

Basically every post has included some form of toxic self-hate, minus one or two mentioning exercise. While I do like being able to confront these in the first place, the purported goals and name of this community gives people who are giving the exact wrong advice far too much credibility, and the last thing these people need is a comment with the most upbears regurgitating individualistic self-help concepts at them.

If we’re going to keep this sort of community around, I suggest doing some serious research and basing it off of DBT, and integrating serious critiques of CBT style mental healthcare and improvement.

I am just some random nerd who is terrible at self-improvement at general, so I understand taking this with some serious doubt. But I just had to get this off my chest.

Thank you, WithoutFurtherBelay

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[-] WithoutFurtherBelay@hexbear.net 7 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Communities are made up of a lot of individual people, ideally all pulling in one direction. A community where all of those people eat healthy and vegan diets will be better than one where they do not. In the absence of a state-driven or society-driven initiative to propel these changes on a big, structural level rather than the individual level, we don't really have much choice but to take things into our own hands, at least in much of the imperial core where such large projects are generally anathema.

Under no circumstances am I disagreeing with this. What I do think is that the way we approach these things is inherently all kinds of brainworm riddled, and the concept of self improvement strikes into the very core of the ideology a lot of us grow up in. When someone says “self-improvement”, tons of lib shit just starts spawning in people’s heads that they wouldn’t believe or say about any other situation. This isn’t a diss on you or the concept of improving oneself for our community (though the “for our community” part is something I find… kind of spamsus but as prospective revolutionaries it’s what we should be doing, at least for now. And I can’t think of a better model, to be honest), it’s a call for people to be extremely careful about how they think about the concept of self improvement in the first place.

It seems you already agree with me on a ton of stuff, so all I really need to say is that I don’t actually care that much about replacing the comm. I trust you know what you’re doing here and I doubt it would be much of an issue if we’re otherwise careful, and it gives us the opportunity to reclaim self improvement as a term, like I think you intend.

this post was submitted on 08 Jan 2024
38 points (100.0% liked)

Self Improvement

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A community which focusses on improving yourself. This can be in many different ways - from improving physical health or appearance, to improving mental health, creating better habits, overcoming addictions, etc.

While material circumstances beyond our control do govern much of our daily lives, people do have agency and choices to make, whether that is as "simple" as disciplining yourself to not doomscroll, to as complex as recreating yourself to have many different hobbies and habits.

This is not a place where all we do is talk about improving "productivity" (in a workplace context) and similar terms and harmful lifestyles like "grindset". Self-improvement here is intended to make you a generally better and happier person, as well as a better communist, and any other roles you may have in your life.

Rules and guidelines:

  1. Posts should be about self-improvement. This is obviously a wide category, and can range from advice, to finding resources, to self-posts about needing to improve in a certain area, or how you have improved, and many other things.

  1. Use content warnings when discussing difficult subjects.

  1. Do not make medical decisions solely because of a discussion you have had with any person here (e.g. whether to take or not take medications; diagnoses; etc.) as we do not vet people. All medical problems should be discussed with a real-life medical professional.

  1. Do not post harmful advice here. If this is seen, then please report it and we shall remove it. If you are unsure about whether it's precisely harmful advice or not but feel uneasy about it, please report it anyway.

  1. Do not insult other users and their lifestyles or their habits (unless they ask, I suppose). This is a place for self-improvement. Critique and discussion about a course of action is encouraged over shit-flinging. Don't talk down to people.

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