Truly, a shrimp? You readily expect me to believe a shrimp, of all the lord's creations, fried this rice? This delectable dish that I am about to partake in? Nonsense, I say! Pure and utter nonsense. A shrimp, no matter how plucky and determined, does not possess the wherewithal to wield a pan and a flame, let alone create a meal fit for a king. No, my good sir or madam, this is a task that requires the touch of a master, a chef of the highest caliber. So, I must implore you, explain to me how this shrimp, this humble crustacean, managed to perform this culinary miracle?