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ELI5 why is anarchy not "the guy with the bigger stick" making the rules?
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The world itself is anarchistic. Each counties has its rules but international politics have no governing body (the UN doesn't really rule over every state, just serve to mediate discussion). The country with the biggest stick would probably be the US, but they haven't conquered Canada or Mexico, let alone everyone else. Other players like Russia or China have influence too.
While the US does have a lot of soft power in influencing nations, they certainly aren't making the rules for other countries and puppeting them.
South America would probably disagree.
That was true in the 60s, but now most south American governments are ostensibly anti-american but need to be in okay terms with america so that they can trade internationally
This is a very rosy eyed statement. The "soft" power is the visible part, just the tip of the iceberg.