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What prevents you from going to bed early?
(programming.dev)
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this post was submitted on 14 Jan 2024
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I don't want to die.
What if I die in my sleep.
What if the house catches fire and I can't escape in time because I was asleep.
There are so many other things I could be doing.
I don't have enough life left.
What if I miss something important or cool.
What if there's a burglar when I'm asleep and it goes south and they murder me.
What if I have an aneurysm in my sleep.
What if I have a stroke in my sleep.
What if I have a heart attack in my sleep.
What if there's a gas leak and the house explodes while I'm asleep.
What if there's a CO leak and I just asphyxiate.
What if I just never wake up for no discernible reason.
I wanna play more video games.
I wanna browse the internet more.
I don't want to have the bad thoughts come back like they always do when I try to sleep.
Ah yes, the "what if I fall asleep and X happens, I should stay awake" anxiety. Fighting the inevitable...
I've dealt with that all my life. Recently it got so bad that I was waking myself up in the middle of the night with these thoughts. I just got a prescription for lorazepam and it has helped more than anything I've tried. I hate sleeping pills because they give me a hungover feeling in the morning. This one just shuts down the anxiety so I can sleep naturally.