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Never heard this expression in my life
You must be rather new to internet then.
Ya it's only been 20 years.
Captain obvious was definitely a 2000 meme so strange you never encountered it. Or maybe you are pulling my leg now - what is even real anymore?
I'm honestly not. I've heard the captain obvious part sporadically, but never seen "have a rock".
Then there are only two possibilities: I spend too much time online, or you spend not enough.