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Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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Mine has always been slow. I started on a raspberry pi but later on a NUC and even on my VPS at Hetzner, it was always like you describe. Because I only used it for calendar, adressbook and sharing a few files I replaced it with Radicale for CalDav and CardDav and Syncthing for sharing files.
Spent a full day setting up Nextcloud so I could file sync my machines and share files externally. It was slow as hell and didn't work half the time.
Spent 10 minutes spinning up Syncthing and FileBrowser containers and have had zero issues with them since.