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BuzzKill is the app you are looking for, with his cooldown feature, it's $3.99 but here is the link if you want to Here.
Just a little FYI before you make a purchase, this cooldown feature is supposed to come on the next android version.
Thanks for your help, this is what I went with. I don't upgrade my phone often so will be a while before I get the new version of Android.
It has a setting to "cooldown" any conversation that notifies me more than once in quick succession
Also found it has a setting where if it sees a verification code, it copies it. Pretty handy too!
Cheers!
Edit - know what's fucking annoying. Yeah it stops the notification noise, not the notification itself. So my audiobook player still goes silent for five seconds then skips back a sentence! ๐ก
+1 for buzzkill in general though, it's a good app