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submitted 2 years ago by JackGreenEarth@lemm.ee to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
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[-] Diplomjodler@feddit.de 38 points 2 years ago

Few people from 2024 understand what I do, so no.

[-] Anticorp@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago
[-] Diplomjodler@feddit.de 16 points 2 years ago

I'm an in-house consultant for Enterprise Content Management.

[-] KISSmyOS@feddit.de 44 points 2 years ago

Sounds IT-related. Can you fix my printer?

[-] Diplomjodler@feddit.de 42 points 2 years ago

Best I can do is strangle you with a USB cable.

[-] Anticorp@lemmy.world 25 points 2 years ago

Nice. This is my new go-to answer for that question.

[-] Diplomjodler@feddit.de 18 points 2 years ago

I'm sure your granny will be thrilled.

[-] KISSmyOS@feddit.de 13 points 2 years ago

If it means I never have to deal with printers again, I'll take it.

[-] tetris11@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 years ago

Can you do 2pm, next Tuesday?

[-] assassinatedbyCIA@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

I'm down. The safe word is 'wenches'.

[-] Diplomjodler@feddit.de 2 points 2 years ago

Have you been stalking me?

[-] PsychedSy@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 years ago

Use a micro or mini-b.

[-] 0_0j@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago
[-] PostProcess@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago

Please tell me it's not Opentext...

[-] Diplomjodler@feddit.de 5 points 2 years ago

Fortunately not. I haven't quite descended to the seventh circle of hell yet.

[-] PhantomPhanatic@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Exceed is still the only program that handles graphically intense Unix X11 sessions properly for Windows machines. It's still not great though.

Some of us still have to slog through old CAD applications that have long been abandoned.

[-] shea@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 2 years ago

Im gonna guess, is that a job where you advise a company on how to organize, store, and use "enterprise content" (im gonna guess that's like internal materials like training stuff, internal tools/software)

[-] Diplomjodler@feddit.de 4 points 2 years ago

Not totally wrong.

[-] dandroid@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

I'm thinking of the episode of That '70s Show where Kelso's dad is trying to explain to Kelso what he does for a homework assignment.

Kelso: "OK, let's get started. Question number one, what's your job?"

John: "I'm a senior executive statistical analysis technician."

Kelso: "You're a senior execu… what?"

John: "Well, in plain English, I concatenate the verse statistical information to maximize the potential utilization of data."

Kelso: "So you give people data!"

( Kelso is on the verge of writing it down. )

John: "A lot of people think that. No. My job's not about output, it's about throughput."

Kelso: "So you throughput data!"

John: "Well, now you've lost me, son. Oh, listen Michael, you know the eight tracks you love so much?"

Kelso: "You make them!"

John: "No, but because of us, other people who make them are able to make them better."

Kelso: "So, you fix stuff!"

John: "You could say that..."

( Kelso starts writing. )

John: "But I wouldn't."

( Kelso erases it with frustration. )

And then it keeps going on the like for a while.

[-] Diplomjodler@feddit.de 2 points 2 years ago

Yeah, that's pretty much how it goes for me.

[-] Empricorn@feddit.nl 1 points 2 years ago

Huh. Somehow I understand even less what you do than before I read that.

[-] Diplomjodler@feddit.de 1 points 2 years ago

My job is to leverage the core competencies of my employer into win win scenarios by proactively and synergistically reengineering document based processes. I hope that clears it up.

this post was submitted on 15 Mar 2024
271 points (97.5% liked)

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