I think the complex of problems is betrayed by the idea that you need some sort of baseline of virility to talk to women. It really seems like any approach to talking to women comes from the lens of a sex pest. Just like men, some women rock and some of them suck - some of them are my friends. The jorkin-masculinity-lookistdefeatist complex is more mentally draining, more socially isolating, and more likely to put you in a psychiatrist's office than the big goblin that believes you can look at a couple boobs as a treat. You can always say no to your addictions and that's an incredibly liberating thought, I would never take that away from anyone if it really helps them be happier. However, I have a hard time getting any buy in when someone talks about their pmo relapses and the dark places it takes them. If you wake up hungover and people are crying about all the damage you did driving last night and you don't remember, it's clear that the drink has you in its grips.

If you're jorkin peanits for 4 hours, you can wash yourself off, take a clorox wipe to your computer desk, and go walk in the park feeling embarrassed for half an hour. Someone has to instill in you and you have to believe that what you did is worthy of fretting over. Even if you're like "damn, what a waste of 4 hours!" it's functionally no different than reading too much manga which would be hard to talk about in relation to endogenous dopamine release. Hell, I even looked at all the studies about gray matter and shit that 4chan likes to throw around and I wasn't convinced when I gave it a once over. "Oh it needs its own classification" and the article was about turning the blanket "internet addiction" diagnosis in the DSM-V into multiple umbrellas for gambling, gaming, porn, etc. whose implications would be less pertaining to novel treatment and likely more for paperwork for insurance companies - never once putting porn in a special place compared to these things. The gray matter study made no inference that there was a causal link that meant porn shrinks your gray matter because the results would have been the same if less gray matter meant porn was more appealing.

I think it's cult-like behavior. Like a baptism searching for eternal life after death, if being absolved of your pornography brings you peace then congratulations but I think you're weird.