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this post was submitted on 25 Jul 2024
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And Finally...
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My brother's best friend was at University in the early nineties and it was the birthdays if one of the guys he shared a house with so they all rushed into his room and shouted "surprise" but they got the surprise as he was humping a cut off shampoo bottle lined with a warm, wet flannel that he'd jammed between his mattress and bedframe.
I imagine they'll eventually find an ancient, improvised Fleshlight at Pompeii because as long as there are have been horny teenagers, there has probably been homemade vaginas.
Pompeii is actually someplace you probably wouldn't find one, considering it was packed with brothels.