Do a vibe check with the anaesthesiologist. Good ones that are aware of this and care about person-to-person variation in response to anesthesia will be chill and explain how they will closely monitor the situation via your vitals and behavior. Good ones will ask about your consumption of alcohol and think very carefully about whether you are lying. Not saying you would lie but if there is any chance don't. Be very forthcoming and accurate about alcohol consumption because it makes you more resistant to most kinds of general anaesthetic and is linked to those negative experiences you mention. They might ask you about whether you have redheads in your family, which is also a good sign.

Basically... you want someone that is on top of their game when it comes to individualized dosing and who seems likely to be paying attention during your procedure. Red flags are anaesthesiologisrs who seem defensive or who give false information (e.g. if they say alcohol consumption doesn't matter). You can also check reviews. Another thing to consider is that every single example I have of an anaesthesiologist that didn't pay attention during a procedure and let someone wake up or nearly wake up has been an old white guy. Anecdotal but food for thought...