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this post was submitted on 11 Aug 2024
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chapotraphouse
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Literally all JFK theories are “I am the one who figured it out”
Mine is that Lee Harvey Oswald really was a lone actor, but one of the various groups that wanted JFK dead assumed he was one of their assets gone rogue, and put Jack Ruby up to killing him before he could talk.
I mention this because, just like you say, my entire evidence is that it feels clever.
Oswald was trying to shoot the grassy knoll guy but a fly bit his beanis right as he was pulling the trigger and he accidentally jfk's entire head.
Alternately, the grassy knoll guy was trying to shoot oswald but the round richotted off of oswald's giant titanium marxist gonads and beanis'd jfk right in the head.
Lmao that is a good one
I mean there's a lot that are just variations of "the official story is a lie, here is a lot of suspicious stuff and it's suspicious it was covered up. I don't know who did it, but I know it wasn't Oswald and I know it was covered up for some reason"
JFK simply ate a whole can of Texan beanis an hour prior, didn't want to embarrass himself infront of Jackie so he held in his fart so long his head exploded.
If you eat the beanis, please make sure to fart, kids.
I am the one who figured it out.