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this post was submitted on 18 Aug 2024
475 points (97.2% liked)
Aneurysm Posting
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Step 3: Prepare a bowl of jelly.
Step 3: Prepare a bowl of sourcream.
Step 2: Prepare a bowl of peanut butter. Touch the bowl gently.
No step: Fingers melt painlessly into caramel. Hold them in your hand.
Step 4: Flatten the peanut butter.
Step 6: Unflatten the peanut butter.
Step 1: Take the peanut butter out of the bowl and put it back in.
Step S: Move peanut butter to a small lasagna baking dish. Flatten and divide into 3 parts.
Step 4: Observe the jelly.
Step 8: Prepare a small bowl of caramel sauce.
Step 3: Stir the caramel once with a finger.
Step 1: Observe the jelly.
Step 8: The spoonful of cum is not needed. Gently remove it from the baking area.
Step 4: Check the jelly is still there.
Step 3: Carefully slice the bread, but you will still cut your finger. The future has already happened. You can not change it.
Step 6: Put sourcream on top of the peanut butter and flatten it.
Step 3: Pour the bowl of sourcream and peanut butter into a bowl of sugar.
Ingest excitedly.
How to make a PBJ sandwiche, step 8 will shock you!
"Step 8: The spoonful of cum is not needed. Gently remove it from the baking area."
I'm dying, good work!
This has me crying lol
How frustrated did you get with Markdown trying to "fix" your numbering while writing that?
Markdown's "smart" numbering is the worst.
What was step 3 again?
I am sorry, but these instructions have no step 3. The steps in these instructions are: 3, 3, 2, error, 4, 6, 1, S, 4, 8, 3, 1, 8, 4, 3, 6 and 3.
Did you mean Step 3?
Lmao, amazing
I really appreciate how much effort you put into this
This was epic. Thank you fine .worder!
You forgot that in step 2 you're supposed to touch the bowl with your toes and/or "good hand."
Oh man you’ve got me cracking up here. That spoon full of cum hahaha. People a bit further are looking very strange at me now
I followed the steps but my jelly managed to get away before Step 3 and ate half my family. I'll try again, but I'm running low on cousins. 5/5 stars.
This looks like a initially simple state machine written in assembler (or a similar language where you have to use jumps for program flow) that has been modified heavily by 15 devs in 25 years in production, while they all shat their pants
; the spoonful of cum is not needed. TODO: Gently remove it from the cooking area.