481
top 45 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] Deestan@lemmy.world 211 points 3 months ago

Step 3: Prepare a bowl of jelly.

Step 3: Prepare a bowl of sourcream.

Step 2: Prepare a bowl of peanut butter. Touch the bowl gently.

No step: Fingers melt painlessly into caramel. Hold them in your hand.

Step 4: Flatten the peanut butter.

Step 6: Unflatten the peanut butter.

Step 1: Take the peanut butter out of the bowl and put it back in.

Step S: Move peanut butter to a small lasagna baking dish. Flatten and divide into 3 parts.

Step 4: Observe the jelly.

Step 8: Prepare a small bowl of caramel sauce.

Step 3: Stir the caramel once with a finger.

Step 1: Observe the jelly.

Step 8: The spoonful of cum is not needed. Gently remove it from the baking area.

Step 4: Check the jelly is still there.

Step 3: Carefully slice the bread, but you will still cut your finger. The future has already happened. You can not change it.

Step 6: Put sourcream on top of the peanut butter and flatten it.

Step 3: Pour the bowl of sourcream and peanut butter into a bowl of sugar.

Ingest excitedly.

[-] NarrativeBear@lemmy.world 40 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

How to make a PBJ sandwiche, step 8 will shock you!

"Step 8: The spoonful of cum is not needed. Gently remove it from the baking area."

I'm dying, good work!

[-] rain_worl@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago

you are WRONG! THIS is step 8:

Step 8: Prepare a small bowl of caramel sauce.

[-] Mothra@mander.xyz 21 points 3 months ago

This has me crying lol

[-] grue@lemmy.world 16 points 3 months ago

How frustrated did you get with Markdown trying to "fix" your numbering while writing that?

[-] Deestan@lemmy.world 12 points 3 months ago

Markdown's "smart" numbering is the worst.

[-] adj16@lemmy.world 15 points 3 months ago

I really appreciate how much effort you put into this

[-] PinkyCoyote@sopuli.xyz 14 points 3 months ago
[-] Deestan@lemmy.world 26 points 3 months ago

I am sorry, but these instructions have no step 3. The steps in these instructions are: 3, 3, 2, error, 4, 6, 1, S, 4, 8, 3, 1, 8, 4, 3, 6 and 3.

Did you mean Step 3?

[-] adj16@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago

Lmao, amazing

[-] Pandantic@midwest.social 9 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

This was epic. Thank you fine .worder!

[-] abcd@feddit.org 6 points 3 months ago

This looks like a initially simple state machine written in assembler (or a similar language where you have to use jumps for program flow) that has been modified heavily by 15 devs in 25 years in production, while they all shat their pants

[-] _stranger_@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

; the spoonful of cum is not needed. TODO: Gently remove it from the cooking area.

[-] orenishii@feddit.nl 6 points 3 months ago

Oh man you’ve got me cracking up here. That spoon full of cum hahaha. People a bit further are looking very strange at me now

[-] EldritchFeminity@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 3 months ago

You forgot that in step 2 you're supposed to touch the bowl with your toes and/or "good hand."

[-] taiyang@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago

I followed the steps but my jelly managed to get away before Step 3 and ate half my family. I'll try again, but I'm running low on cousins. 5/5 stars.

[-] bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de 34 points 3 months ago
[-] deuleb_biezelbob@programming.dev 26 points 3 months ago

step 3 is such an eye-opener!

[-] FiniteBanjo@lemmy.today 8 points 3 months ago

Tbh Step 3 was as far as I got. How do you get to step 3 from step 3?

[-] deuleb_biezelbob@programming.dev 5 points 3 months ago

I dont nnow halve my face whenwent limp anddd went itself

[-] FunderPants@lemmy.ca 23 points 3 months ago

Looks like I'm out of a job.

[-] KoalaUnknown@lemmy.world 19 points 3 months ago

I got a similar result with ChatGPT; however, it has no issues with written instructions. Interestingly, when I asked it to convert the written instructions into an image, it still gave a result similar to OP’s.

[-] oce@jlai.lu 2 points 3 months ago

It seems there's a fundamental incapacity for the model to produce an ordered series of images inside one image. What if you ask to describe each step with a separate image?

[-] fuckingkangaroos@lemm.ee 15 points 3 months ago

Over a third of the many steps are literally just peanut butter, which is not quite enough peanut butter but close.

[-] sunbrrnslapper@lemmy.world 9 points 3 months ago

Nevermind the ordering and triangle shaped bread. What the f*** is the white stuff?!? Absolutely nothing on a PB&J should be white.

[-] UraniumBlazer@lemm.ee 6 points 3 months ago

It's called whole fat bull milk

[-] notabot@lemm.ee 4 points 3 months ago

Mayonnaise.

[-] Kecessa@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 months ago

Could be whipped cream... I would try it

[-] Pandantic@midwest.social 3 points 3 months ago

Marshmallow fluff!

[-] oce@jlai.lu 8 points 3 months ago

I tried to focus to follow up, and it made me laugh.

[-] affiliate@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago

the jelly looks more like cranberry sauce than actually jelly

[-] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 6 points 3 months ago

The shit just works!

[-] Pandantic@midwest.social 6 points 3 months ago

Is there a word for uncanny valley but it’s not a person?

[-] roguetrick@lemmy.world 9 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Just uncanny. I like that word by the way, one of the few we picked up from the scots.

https://www.etymonline.com/word/canny

The older sense of eldritch and the newer sense of weird also all work. Unfortunately using all these words means we're calling AI models fae. In a lot of ways, of course, true AI would be fae

[-] PinkyCoyote@sopuli.xyz 5 points 3 months ago

This might be my favourite post here lol

[-] adj16@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago

❤️

I thought I was having a stroke trying to understand it before I realized what it was, and it just struck me that it would be right at home in this community

[-] Etterra@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago

My favorite step is backwards ð (eth). Step 8 is pretty good too.

[-] huquad@lemmy.ml 2 points 3 months ago

Man I really need to learn how to cook. Been making them wrong my whole life

[-] Etterra@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

I love that derploaf bread.

[-] adj16@lemmy.world 1 points 3 months ago

I think the bread and the pb fused into some creamy carby hybrid?

[-] gndagreborn@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

This is what medical school feels like for me.

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 1 points 3 months ago

Nothing makes a good PB&J like some miracle whip.

[-] Reverendender@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 months ago

It’s got that tangy zip

[-] Chef_Boyardee@lemm.ee 1 points 3 months ago

I think the real problem is someone needing instructions for making a PB&j.

[-] 0oWow@lemmy.world 1 points 3 months ago

We finally found out who is hoarding all of the peanut butter! It was AI all along!!

this post was submitted on 18 Aug 2024
481 points (97.2% liked)

Aneurysm Posting

1808 readers
150 users here now

For shitposting by people who can smell burnt toast.

Instance Rules:

  1. Nothing promoting crypto, blockchain or NFTs.
  2. Nothing right wing.
  3. Nothing anti science.
  4. No tankie support.
  5. No TERFS.
  6. No porn.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS