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this post was submitted on 10 Aug 2023
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Being "high" on depression sounds very snarky and I do not believe you. I wish you to be well.
This is me reaching out to you, saying the world is a better place for having you in it. If you disagree, I insist that you send me a PM so we can talk it over.
You are a worthy human being.
I'm not a native English speaker. So I didn't knew that it would come out as snarky
In real life, yes I'm snarky and high horsed. I brag too much without pretty much any output. I'm very annoying to be around. For different reasons, that's how I got shaped up
As for depression, I've been suffering from it since high school. It was a very gradual slope. Always had rock bottom self esteem. Can't fit into people my age. Socially awkward, innocent and dumb beyond comprehension. Didn't really help when my own fcking father was forcefully trying to shape me into his outdated perfect image of a man
Right now, I've failed my first year in college. I am going to repeat. I'm a lot mentally prepared now than when I got in. Don't know if it's enough
I'm trying my best to identify and fill my potholes. I have planned to see my uni counselor for the same. It's really so wholesome and humane to see that a complete stranger is inviting enough with another stranger's issues. Have a nice day mate
Neither am I, but I've yet to meet someone enjoying depression to the point of getting a "high" out of it.
Time may be linear, but life and learning is not. I'm 49, and was diagnosed with adhd at 47 -- let me tell you, that put my past in perspective. I, too, have had many, many more failures than I'd like, and have had my battles with my inner demons. I'm still around, and want to provide as much compassion as I needed then. So I'm very glad to hear back from you, total stranger.
Be proud of your core identity. Have faith that things will work out. They may not be perfect, but in life there is zero guarantee of things being "fair" so be greatful for what little you feel that you do have going for you. I'm cheering for you.