1203

submitted 2 weeks ago by PugJesus@lemmy.world to c/196@lemmy.blahaj.zone

189 comments fedilink hide all child comments

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[-] gurapo@lemmy.pt 19 points 2 weeks ago

I don't usually comment in these types of gender discussions, so I don't really know why I am commenting this. I hope you don't take me badly.

You say that we live in a society that caters to men first, which I unfortunately agree in general, adding later that, due to the usual prepertrators of the hideous crimes you listed being men (which I also agree), women usually jump to the conclusion that the man is the abuser. Knowing that, couldn't it be said that in this specific situation society caters to women rather than men? After all, you can't say "most abusers are men, therefore this abuser is a man." Each person is an individual. From a purely mathematical perspective, it indeed makes sense to suspect the man first, but that being the case, wouldn't bringing up that first point be:

a. True, but in matters unrelated to the discussion? b. Contradicting what you say in the end?

And therein lies my question to you. I am not that informed in these gender-related affairs and I am sorry if anything I said was wrong/insensitive, but I still ask this question, for no reason other than probably being sleepy. Thank you, and I apologize if I misunderstood anything. I did not watch the show that was mentioned, I really just wanted to ask about that specific part.

[-] LustyArgonianMana@lemmy.world -5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

No, society still caters to men. Who are the ones responding to domestic violence calls - other men, the police, who also engage in these same crimes.

I had an ex throw me to the ground and lock me outside in the rainin my pajamas. When I called 911, the police came, and I was crying and bleeding under my pajamas from the fall. The officer immediately threatened to arrest me, saying women fake it all the time, and if he found any marks on him or if his story was different, I would go to jail. I was 19. I hadn't touched him, he had just exploded in a rage because we broke up and couldn't agree about moving out. It didn't even occur to me that I wouldn't get help and also might be hurt. I declined having him arrested while I actively bled from what he did, I didn't show the police the marks, and then i became $2k in debt because I wanted to do anything to break the lease (and could've done if for free had he been arrested).

Society doesn't help abuse victims of any gender. The people who enforce the laws are abusers. Lawyers are often abusers. Judges are typically men who make up abusers. Look at the judges Trump put in place and imagine women trying to justify their abortion from their rapes to them. Like yes the patriarchy is systemic AGAINST WOMEN in this way. Intersectionality exists, and does not erase this real fact

Eta: After the election, fuck all the men who downvoted this post especially this line:

Look at the judges Trump put in place and imagine women trying to justify their abortion from their rapes to them

[-] gurapo@lemmy.pt 0 points 2 weeks ago

Thank you for your answer. I see your point. I was thinking more about the specific situation described in the comic, and not one where it had already escalated to the point where police and the justice system got involved, and I have to wonder what kind of life the cop lived through to reach the conclusion that "women fake it all the time." But even worse than there being cops like this is the fact that even if it came to light that they were like this there is a high chance they would not be punished at all.

Case in question, in my country, a cop fatally shot a guy because he "looked like he had a knife." That's already disgusting enough, but as far as I know, he wasn't going to be punished until big protest erupted. It's a sistematic issue, and unfortunately, there's not much we can do aside from voting.

With trump being elected, this issue is sure to become even worse. And since trump seems to be specifically against women's freedom, it will probably get even harder for women to defend themselves and bring the perpetrator to justice.

But I sincerely hope that a situation like that doesn't happen again, to you or anyone you know. Good luck in the future, and stay safe.

As a sidenote, and don't answer if you don't want to, why did you decline his arrest? Was there any chance that could turn against you?

[-] LustyArgonianMana@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Also, I want to tell you that in the US, the only thing that matters is if something is legally enforceable. That's it. If it's not legally enforceable, then there will never be any justice for the victim. So yeah, it's actually MORE relevant that official bodies explicitly are against women because it shows that we literally don't have as much power. That's fucked up and a miscarriage of justice and rights. And now that Trump was just elected, he will appoint even more judges and police and enact more antiwoman and for-rape laws including limiting abortion access, limiting divorce access, and limiting birth control access.

In areas where some of these laws have taken place already, teen girls have already birthed their fathers incest rape baby in their closet and then stabbed it with a knife after.

But yeah, pointing out women experience abuse disproportionately worse than most men, at the hands of men, is really bad I guess. Because it's more important that we focus on men's pain than women's literal enslavement and erosion of rights. And then men wonder why 4B exists and why women can't talk to them anymore to explain the basics of Feminism. They downvote you when their feelings are hurt, tell you how stupid you are as a woman to talk about these political things, and then go and vote for fucking Trump en masse and kill us all to climate change. Thanks, guys!

[-] LustyArgonianMana@lemmy.world -3 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I declined his arrest because he was very poor and I thought the prison system would ruin his life. I felt bad for him. Because the patriarchy demands empathy for men at all times, I guess.

Eta: you are profoundly empathetically deficient if you downvote someone's abuse story like this. He didn't deserve my empathy but I gave it to him out of kindness. And you all can't even extend it to me to just not downvote? This is why women hate men. You all GET THE MAJORITY OF THE BENEFIT and you STILL treat women like trash and act like the victim! Lol! And then you all vote for fucking Trump while playing the victim and gaslighting women that women have the benefit in court when you shitheads are the ones stacking it. I fucking hate men. The only reason I'd get pregnant by a man is so I would have something of yours to kill in an abortion.