"The last four of five days have been really rough. I'm sorry I yelled at you." Might be a good phrase to use in this instance.
generally, meeting people where they're at is the best path to understanding. if your primary goal is apology acceptance not teaching adhd, then tie your apology language to words and phrases he'll understand easily, words he uses to communicate.
rather than communicate an "episode" of adhd, just focus on the stuff he and everyone already gets. being exhausted, tired and grumpy is something that happens to everyone, so he'll understand if you couch it in those terms.
later when things are smoothed over is a better time to teach/share about the stressors that can lead you to snap.
p.s. me and my partner use 'bad brain day' as shorthand to communicate when we are grumpy, having a depression dip, or things just aren't running smooth upstairs and that we're not mad or anything, just having a lil internal struggle
I'm a very formal apologizer, and have dealt with (and gotten through, mostly) emotional dysfunction and anger issues over many years.
"I'm sorry about yesterday's outburst. I've been having a pretty tough time lately and I took that out on you; please don't take it personally, you didn't deserve that. I feel like I've been really getting swept up in my emotions. While I can't regulate them as much as I'd like, I will try to separate myself from situations before I explode."
That fight-or-flight instinct kicks in so goddamned hard; I pretty much find it impossible to deal with in the moment once it has started. I have gotten much better at noticing triggers and removing myself from bad situations and grounding myself before that happens.
It's ADHD, Autism, OCD, schizophrenia, anxiety, depression, bi-polar, aspd, etc etc etc etc
“neurologically atypical patterns of thought or behavior”
So, it’s very broad, if you feel like it describes you then it does as far as we're concerned
1.) ableist language=post or comment will probably get removed (enforced case by case, some comments will be removed and restored due to complex situations). repeated use of ableist language=banned from comm and possibly site depending on severity. properly tagged posts with CW can use them for the purposes of discussing them
2.) always assume good faith when dealing with a fellow nd comrade especially due to lack of social awareness being a common symptom of neurodivergence
2.5) right to disengage is rigidly enforced. violations will get you purged from the comm. see rule 3 for explanation on appeals
3.) no talking over nd comrades about things you haven't personally experienced as a neurotypical chapo, you will be purged. If you're ND it is absolutely fine to give your own perspective if it conflicts with another's, but do so with empathy and the intention to learn about each other, not prove who's experience is valid. Appeal process is like appealing in user union but you dm the nd comrade you talked over with your appeal (so make it a good one) and then dm the mods with screenshot proof that you resolved it. fake screenies will get you banned from the site, we will confirm with the comrade you dm'd.
3.5) everyone has their own lived experiences, and to invalidate them is to post cringe. comments will be removed on a case by case basis depending on determined level of awareness and faith
4.) Interest Policing will not be tolerated in any form. Support your comrades in their joy!
Further rules to be added/ rules to be changed based on community input
RULES NOTE: For this community more than most we understand that the clarity and understandability of these rules is very important for allowing folks to feel comfortable, to that end please don't be afraid to be outspoken about amendments and addendums to these rules, as well as any we may have missed