Reminds me of a joke.

An inspector is touring a hospital, and as they walk around they see a gorgeous nurse giving a blowjob to a patient. the inspector asks what is going on, the doctor explains "he has a rare condition where he needs to get relieved regularly or be in debilitating pain", the inspector lets it go and continue,

then they see someone sitting in the middle of the hallway masturbating.

the inspector asks what is going on, the doctor says "same condition, different insurance"

Emotional support prostitute. I have a prescription.

I think it was the netherlands where you could actually get a prostitute prescribed and paid for by social security. but only if you are physically disabled or something

Sorry officer, I'll have your daughter home by ten.

Sir, that's my wife, and you're calling my wife a whore.

Sometimes, getting laid is the best thing for your mental health. She's not a prostitute she's a mental health care provider.

Excuse me officer but who starts a conversation like that? I just sat down!