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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by slowwcore@lemmy.fmhy.ml to c/cat@lemmy.world

i want a little buddy not an obedient kitten. I wanna have conversations with my cat through our actions not tell him to do everything i say. I would love for him to think for himself and learn. but hes sooo stupid guys i know he's young (a year and 8 months i believe) but im also not speaking his language. he's smart im sorry. but he keeps biting me even though im like heyy stop!!! and he's been knocking over his water dish. and eating our roomates plants! he has so much spark and when i teach him sit/stay it breaks my heart because i don't see any of his personality, just a cat who is really in want of a treat. im his only source of food!!! of course he'll sit/stay but he KNOWS hes better than that! maybe i should hide little bits of food around the kitchen living room and bedroom (all the rooms i and him have access to) so he can feel like hes hunting and he'll eat the food instead of wrecking plants? or would that just encourage that behaviour. even know as i type this up i ignore him and he scratches at me. he wants my attention so bad! i don't wanna be an absent mother!!!! he deserves stimulation and attention and praise and patience !!! sit stay is bullshit!!!!!!! hes really cute but hes cute regardless. sit stay is to show off! how well trained he is! i don't wanna train him just teach him what I prefer he does ! im kinda high and i love my cat please share cat tips/advice

edit: added an image of him!!

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[-] Moghul@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago

i don’t see any of his personality, just a cat who is really in want of a treat.

That's also part of his personality, isn't it? He's food driven, nothing wrong with that. He's going to learn and adapt to his environment, and if that environment includes you teaching him tricks, he's going to learn and adapt to that. If you teach him tricks, he might do them on his own in hopes of getting food instead of eating plants, or he might not.

PS, he's cute as fuck

[-] Yuki@kutsuya.dev 12 points 1 year ago

Dude, just love your cat and he'll love you back. I taught my cat the meaning of "food". As in, even I say FOOD?! he comes sprinting in hope for food. Same goes for when I say OUTSIDE?! he knows what it means and sprints to the door.

You can definitely learn them things and they will also love you unconditionally!

[-] slowwcore@lemmy.fmhy.ml 4 points 1 year ago

sorry i just get worried cause ive never had a cat or even a dog before. this is my first ever pet and its scary!

[-] Linssiili@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 year ago

I recommend binge-watching Jackson Galaxy on youtube, he helped me immensively to understand my first cat. He also has videos for pretty much all issues one might have with a cat.

[-] ThayWizGwar@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

I second Jackson Galaxy. I learn something from every video.

[-] Aux@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Don't hurt your cat and everything else will be fine.

[-] dragonfly@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago

Teach him high five, it's pretty easy and super cute. Also, if you haven't already, get a harness and start training him for that so you can take walks together safely. Hiding treats is a great activity, it helps satisfy the hunting urge. You can even do this with regular food, hide small amounts in various changing locations around your space, so he has to go hunting.

[-] slowwcore@lemmy.fmhy.ml 5 points 1 year ago

thanks so much this is a super helpful reply : ))

[-] TheActualDevil@sffa.community 11 points 1 year ago

There is something that took me a long time to fully realize about having cats that went a long way to helping me both understand how best to care for them and how to handle the frustrations that caring for them brings. I'm a caretaker for basically wild animals. I'm not their owner. I'm not their parent. They are wild animals that are not really adapted for the environment that humans have put them in, so we as a society need to do what we can to keep them healthy and happy. That means inviting them into our homes and making it as hospitable as reasonably possible.

I've done a lot of research on cat's needs. Healthy diet and mental stimulation are foremost of these. I found healthy food that they like and keep them to a feeding schedule. I play with them actively on a regular basis and give them lots of space/things that they can enjoy on their own as well. All that done, my cats are appreciative of the environment they're provided and the food and occasional treats they get. They are two of the most well behaved and loving cats. One is pretty independent most of the time, but will snuggle in calmer moments. The other is a snuggly goofball who just wants to live in my lap.

Teaching them tricks can also be part of that mental stimulation. It's recommended by cat behavior experts. And part of being a caretaker is keeping them safe, so teaching them "no" and boundaries is important. What helped me with all of this was setting aside specific times for play/trick teaching time (Before feeding is best, as they're more motivated to do things for food if they aren't full). Routine is important for cats. And then an occasional random play session when they're not used to it is a special treat for them.

You clearly care for the little guy and want the best for him. That's great and so important. You'll do great.

[-] Apytele@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Part of loving your cat for who they are is understanding his wants and needs and how his cognitive level factors into him meeting them. It also sounds like you need to better understand the type of stimulation he needs to be happy. Cats are often food motivated, but they also need to chase and murder things (even if they're not actually alive) and scratch and feel their tendons in their arms stretch (serves multiple functions ultimately but that's the stimulation they need). They need those things the same way people need to sing and dance and make and view art and tell and listen to stories. They don't do it to be good at it they just kinda... gotta. If they don't get to do enough of that they will go a little stir crazy.

Personally I prefer a cat OR dog to jump away from something if I tell them to, and I will move them somewhere less stimulating or even spray the cat with water if they don't. From my perspective it's my job to keep them safe and if they're trying to get at something that's going to hurt them like chewing on an electrical wire or trying to eat something toxic I need them to stop right away, not five seconds later when I make it across the room and they're already hurt or going to be very sick. And I need to be able to teach them not to do it even when I'm not looking (but like I said the biggest trick to that is making sure there's other stimulating things that are WAY BETTER anyway).

[-] skyler@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Teaching a cat tricks of any kind isn't inherently mean. Forcing a cat to do them against their will would be mean. If your little guy is willing to sit and learn tricks for treats then you're not being mean. If he wants nothing to do with the tricks but you keep forcing him to try, or start only giving him food for tricks, then that'd be mean.

A surprisingly easy trick to teach him is jumping through an arm hoop. It might be a more fun for him. Here's a pretty good video on how to teach it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-my7J_8gcE.

Just make sure to keep training sessions pretty short. 1 to 5 minutes is how long my cat's training sessions tend to be. But you'll have to figure out what your cat can handle. If he seems uninterested or tired then it's time to stop.

Is he biting when you're playing or just spontaneously? If it's during playtime you can try making a pain noise and then stop playing with him for a bit. He should pick up that getting too rough equals no more fun.

Hiding treats is a great way to give him some stimulation, but I'm not certain it will help keep him off the plants. Some cats just really like shredding up plants. Maybe getting him some cat grass to destroy instead could work?

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this post was submitted on 18 Jul 2023
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