My English teacher back in highschool was very picky about using “they” like most people do. I can hear him say “you have to use FORMAL LANGUAGE” in my head still lol

If it’s an unknown person we were told to use “he or she” instead of “they” and “his or her” instead of “their” despite the fact that no one fucking talks that way when referring to an unknown individual.

Like even saying “everyone should bring their laptop to class” would be marked wrong because “everyone” is singular so the “correct” version is “everyone should bring his or her laptop to class” which imo is way more confusing

However, he was also fine with us using masculine singular pronouns when the gender of a person wasn’t known, which I guess is kind of the case in like Spanish and some other Latin languages but still, just really weird rules

The thing that really grinds my gears is the excessive use of "he/she". Workplace training is a regular offender for this. Just use the word "they" FFS, it's sat right there on the shelf for you.

Or don't, just go with "he" or "she", this fictional person in your 'case study' isn't real, they don't give a shit.

I've started yelling "NO PRONOUNS" and "USE HE/SHE BECAUSE HE/SHE IS NOT AN OBJECT" at my conservative relatives and acquaintances who complain about pronouns and gender-neutral anything.

No, Deborah, the non-binary person who helped you figure out your phone today is not the cause of societies' downfall, nor are they responsible for high grocery prices.

They complain about pronouns, but use them constantly. Clearly they don't truly know what a pronoun is. They complain about gender neutral stuff, but use neutral language all the time.

So I've been loudly pointing out every time they do.

I've been uninvited from a lot of future family gatherings. oh nooooooooooo

I wish my English teachers didn't beat me up so hard (figuratively) as incorrect use of 'they' when it has a long history of usage in the singular.

They don’t now what they talkin bout

it genuinely causes confusion though, someone told me "they" (a different person), were going to be there early and I was like "they're all going to come early?!"

On the other hand, some people blow their tops when I match singular they to singular verb forms. I think people just like getting angry.

they have half a point in that its typically only applied to people when a gender is unknown or you are referring to a group. that falls apart pretty quick though because unknown gender is barely any different from someone choosing not to identify with one. also, half a point is no good in the first place.

They usually only use it for unknown people though, which is why it sounds strange to them to use for a known person.

Chinese language is gender neutral:

他 (tā) - he/she/~~it~~, singular
(Edit: "it" is actually "它", but its the same pronunciation)
他们 (tā mén) - they, plural

So simple... there's no fuss about pronouns lmfao

Imagine all the problems that would go away if the US just used a better language xD

But for a linking word. It's a comma splice.

And it goes back to at least Chaucer, so it's been in recorded use for like six centuries. Most definitely not "new".

I don't think this would've happened though if there hadn't been the societal impetus that aided adoption. The singular they may have been around since Chaucer or Shakespeare - ~30 years ago, people didn't really use it. There was far more "he or she" going on, that's now been more commonly replaced with a "they," also because it's shorter. English benefits from the fact that the neutral pronoun slots right in to the existing grammar. Other languages struggle with finding such a neutral replacement because it's more often than not a new word and a slightly altered grammatical function. English is okay on the first problem and arguably okay to mostly okay on the second.

My MIL is one of those people who love to complain about the use of 'they', and my wife loves to point out when she uses it (often in the same sentence as the complaint).

Of course they do, especially when the number of people is ambiguous or when they are speaking about someone titled as a profession such as "I went to the doctor and they said..."

It is all a manufactured situation used to push hate and attack the marginalised. Singular they has been around for a very long time and there were options before they was they, not to mention in all the other myriad languages in the world.

To me it's quite unnatural to use singular they about someone whose gender I actually know.