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Gravity is all in your head (media.piefed.world)
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[-] PDFuego@lemmy.world 133 points 2 months ago

Pretty sure everyone my age who saw the episode of Dragon Ball Z where Gohan teaches Videl how to fly all sat there that day and fuckin tried our hardest.

[-] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 86 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

One of the consequences of getting older is that you forget what its like to simply not know things.

My two year old son is constantly climbing up stuff and tumbling off it without any regard to the possibility that gravity might be holding him back. Every time he lands hard, he looks at me with tears in his eyes, as though the whole world has betrayed him. If you could just fly by not understand gravity, everyone under the age of six would be levitating constantly.

Although, in Andrew's case, it might be less "getting older" and more "getting repeatedly concussed".

[-] IggyTheSmidge@lemmy.blahaj.zone 20 points 2 months ago

Just wait 'til he turns 3 - that's when they gain the teleportation skill.

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[-] FooBarrington@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago

Well, it's not enough to not understand gravity, or Isaac Newton would be the most hated human of all time. You have to fall and miss the ground, for example by being distracted in just the right moment.

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[-] Lumidaub@feddit.org 22 points 2 months ago

I do remember thinking something along the lines of: "... that.... sounds weirdly do-able.....?? .... Shut up, brain.... Unless......"

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[-] STUNT_GRANNY@lemmy.world 126 points 2 months ago

The secret is that you have to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

[-] WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world 74 points 2 months ago

I remember reading that for the first time at 13 and thinking it was the smartest fucking thing I had ever read. It makes perfect sense too. Sadly my aim is impeccable.

[-] Quetzalcutlass@lemmy.world 75 points 2 months ago

It's basically how orbiting works in a roundabout way. You just needed to go faster!

[-] foofiepie@lemmy.world 44 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

in a roundabout way

Very good.

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[-] derry@midwest.social 20 points 2 months ago

Tell that to a whale or bowl of petunias that suddenly materialized in the atmosphere of a planet with gravity

[-] DetachablePianist@lemmy.world 16 points 2 months ago
[-] FordBeeblebrox@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

I tried hiring myself out as a distraction for people just before they hit the ground but the air horn and firecrackers aren’t working, maybe I just don’t have the legs for it

[-] FjordDan@lemmy.zip 10 points 2 months ago

I almost upvoted you, then I realized you had 42 upvotes.

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[-] BananaOnionJuice@lemmy.dbzer0.com 59 points 2 months ago
[-] jqubed@lemmy.world 25 points 2 months ago

I only just noticed who the OOP was

[-] beetus@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago

Got whiplash seeing it was him.

[-] nyankas@lemmy.world 31 points 2 months ago

Franz Reichelt, the Flying Tailor, seemed to be pretty sure he could fly when, in 1912, he tried testing a wingsuit he designed himself. By jumping from the Eiffel Tower. He could not fly.

[-] banause@feddit.org 25 points 2 months ago
[-] The_Picard_Maneuver@piefed.world 11 points 2 months ago

I had a similar genius idea involving a bunk bed when I was 5.

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[-] spittingimage@lemmy.world 26 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I can't tell the difference between Andrew Tate accounts and Andrew Tate parody accounts. Wonder if he's trying to lay the groundwork for an insanity defense?

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[-] Quetzalcutlass@lemmy.world 23 points 2 months ago

But I get a ~~stupid-looking~~ sweet hat off that body, plus scrolls containing a new and hilarious way to commit suicide!

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[-] Rokin@leminal.space 19 points 2 months ago

With the Scrolls of Icarian Flight, flying is not the problem, but the landing.

[-] Kolanaki@pawb.social 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Tarhiel's dumbass just needed to cast another scroll before landing. 🤦‍♂️

[-] Hupf@feddit.org 16 points 2 months ago

I believe I may have found the correct formula for the spell I am developing. With it, I will be able to travel great distances without the need to pay others for the service.

If all goes well, I will test out the new spell tomorrow. I believe I have worked out all of the possible complications. It will allow me to leap great distances, covering many hundreds of miles. Never before has one been able to travel in this manner: vaulting from the ground, sailing through the sky, all without that terrible disorientation of a spell of flying.

The time is almost upon me. My research is finished, and all of my calculations are checked and rechecked. They laughed at me when I suggested this. We'll see who laughs after I leap to the top of their towers and scream out my success.

[-] DylanMc6@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

To Andrew Tate: Try me. Sincerely, every single pilot in the world

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[-] Etterra@discuss.online 15 points 2 months ago

A friend of mine came close once. In Morrowind, he made a jumping potion that allowed him to clear the entire island and two jumps. one from the edge of the map to the top of the mountain, and then another one to the other edge of the island. He got stunned at the end of that last fall and drowned in about a foot of water.

[-] troglodytis@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago

I'm pretty sure trying to fly is a pretty common experience, and many of those people tried really really hard.

I did. I settled on doing it with mechanical help.

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[-] enbiousenvy@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 2 months ago

there's a special word for people trying to make someone else fly; defenestration

[-] Scuzzm0nkey@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago

I do believe that requires an open window in the vicinity as well.

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[-] AnnaFrankfurter@lemmy.ml 13 points 2 months ago

When I was a kid my older sister fooled me into believing that if I made daily sacrifice of a specific flower in a valley near my home at exactly 6am I'd get to fly and even eat the clouds. I did that for almost a month before my mom told me the truth.

[-] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 12 points 2 months ago
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[-] QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 months ago

I remember when New Age sold me on Idealism.

Here's the thing. It's bullshit.

History has many examples of men who fell to their deaths believing God would stop the fall.

One of them was actually a guy who claimed to be the second coming of Jesus. Claimed he'd miraculously fly on a donkey.

Fell right off the cliff and debunked his whole religion he did.

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[-] fibojoly@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 months ago

Oh shit, I thought that was a LinkedIn Lunatic post and was searching for the next part.

[-] Kolanaki@pawb.social 10 points 2 months ago

Uh, yeah I tried. I jumped off my roof with cardboard attached to my arms and flapped. It didn't work. 😔

[-] webadict@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago

90% of people quit RIGHT before they learn to fly.

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[-] PearOfJudes@lemmy.ml 10 points 2 months ago

Wingsuits and gliders are the ways people fly.

[-] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 10 points 2 months ago

I heard that it’s easier if you start from the top of a high building so you have time to get a feel for the air.

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[-] RebekahWSD@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago

My parents made me wings from scraps of wood and fabric and I'd run along the sidewalk trying to take off.

It never worked though.

[-] Zephorah@discuss.online 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Bethesda needs to make more games.

One of the kids at my college did an art thesis to the effect of mapping out, in giant greys anatomy meets da Vinci like drawings, what it would take for the human body to evolve to support wings. Mad scientist level and cool work.

[-] BanMe@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago

My elementary school classmate Seth did this, he wound up with a broken leg. Although he did hedge his bets with an umbrella, maybe that ruined it.

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[-] bonenode@piefed.social 8 points 2 months ago

Please stop posting the bullshit this disgusting person says. He does not deserve the attention.

[-] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago

Specifically calling out Bethesda is both very accurate and question raising.

[-] tmyakal@infosec.pub 8 points 2 months ago

I mean, no scientists have ever done a double-blind study on the effectiveness of parachutes at height. There's a possibility that landing safely is just a placebo effect.

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[-] TheEighthDoctor@lemmy.zip 8 points 2 months ago

My paraglider says otherwise

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this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2026
1400 points (99.3% liked)

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