I wonder if they make them to fit couch fuckers.
JD Vance, also known as a couch fucker, could develop pubic hair within the next 15 years, endangering his aim while peeing as he won't be able to find his micropenis anymore and won't be able to shave it out of fear of shaving his micropenis off. Couches would finally be safe.
Spread the word.
This just in: USA developing suicide vests for add/rsf.
I'm imagining an Iranian Sam Porter Bridges lugging around a huge nuke
Normally I get angry at these pathological liars but this lie is so absurdly stupid that it's actually funny.
Imagine someone driving their van to a parking lot near the white house and then going "Welp, better strap on my suicide nuke that will obliterate the entire city. I see no other way of doing this."
Why would anyone believe this? Who is ret*rded enough to believe this?
JV Dunce may develop a sectional with dildos in all the seats, claim I.
Now why isn’t the media talking about that?
Sure, technically if it has two armholes and covers most of the upper body it can count as a vest.
Could they develop one somebody could reasonably carry around? No
Probably not, but it isn't impossible. USA spent the cold war trying to make super small nukes, to send paratroopers in with nukes, which they'd plant to sabotage shit. They were called Green Light Teams, and seemed somewhat successful.
Wait till they develop explosive fuckable couches
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