Can you tell them apart?
Yes I can. Without reading the article. Ned Flanders is a good, kind, generous person despite his weird religious beliefs. Mike Johnson is none of those things.
"My wife spent the last few weeks on her knees in prayer to the lord, and, uh, she's a little worn out."
-Actually Mike Johnson, somehow.
Okay, I cannot help but think that 'the lord' is their name for his dick.
It's like Joel Dongsteen
odds on it wasn't praying that wore her out?
99% chance it was praying. Fundies are weird about sex for pleasure and anything that isn't missionary.
Outwardly. Behind closed doors they are some of the most fucked up people that exist.
The only one I got wrong.
This was pretty easy because Ned is not an asshole.
“[My wife] spent the last couple of weeks on her knees in prayer to the Lord. And, um, she’s a little worn out.”
Only one I missed.
Maude Flanders had amazing endurance for praying to the lord. You insult her memory by insinuating that she would get tired.
You insult her memory
Maude passed?! What happened?! Damn. This is terrible news.
Shirt cannon
Me too. That's insane
Me too. Stupid sexy flanders.
Same here
Less time on your back, more time on your knees is the only one I missed! I know my sweet Neddy.
The Ark Encounter is one way to bring people to this recognition of the truth, that what we read in the Bible are actual historical events.
Ah, yes. The ark museum that required modern structural engineering techniques and materials, teams of construction crews and not just a family of eight, and active ventilation to continually remove the toxic levels of methane that wood naturally produces.
Such a factually true account of history.
If you remove all the ungodly building codes and laws and regulations, you can make a museum that looks like a boat, with bronze aged tools!
100%. If it seems too innocent or self-aware it's Flanders.
“Spend less time on your back and more time on your knees.” and “[My wife] spent the last couple of weeks on her knees in prayer to the Lord. And, um, she’s a little worn out.” I got wrong.
One sounds like a classic Simpsons joke and the other sounds like a condescending asshole.
I'm sure the "on your back" was a totally different context.
Ned Flanders is a lot more well meaning.
TIL sexy homosexual "barbarians" ransacked Rome, left no man's purse untouched
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