97
Apple Pie rule (lemmy.world)

Blood-Soaked Apple Pie Recipe

Ingredients

  1. Crust of War

    • 2 1/2 cups flour from the ground bones of the fallen
    • 1 teaspoon salt from the tears of enemies
    • 1 teaspoon sugar, sweet as the taste of victory
    • 1 cup butter, as cold as the heart of Khorne
    • 4-8 tablespoons ice water, chilled like the winds of the Chaos Wastes
  2. Filling of Conquest

    • 6-8 large apples, plucked from the orchards of conquered realms
    • 2/3 cup sugar, as much as the spoils of war
    • 2 tablespoons flour, as binding as the chains of slaves
    • 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon, fiery as the pits of battle
    • 1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg, dark as the secrets of Chaos
    • 1/4 teaspoon ground ginger, sharp as the blades of Khorne
    • 1 tablespoon lemon juice, sour as the defeat of foes
  3. Topping of Triumph

    • 1 egg, beaten as fiercely as Khorne's war drums
    • 1 tablespoon sugar, glistening like the sweat of warriors

Instructions

  1. Forge the Pie Crust:

    • In the cauldron of doom, combine bone-flour, salt, and sugar.
    • Mix in the cold, heartless butter until the mixture resembles the coarse ground of a battlefield.
    • Gradually stir in ice water, just enough to bind the souls of the damned.
    • Divide the dough into two, wrap in the skins of foes, and chill in the dark recesses of the Chaos realm.
  2. Prepare the Filling:

    • Skin and slice the apples, as one prepares for war.
    • In the trophy bowl, mix apples with the spoils of sugar, flour, fiery cinnamon, dark nutmeg, sharp ginger, and lemon juice, sour as defeat.
  3. Assemble the Pie:

    • Preheat your infernal oven to the fires of battle.
    • Unleash the first half of the dough onto a pie plate, as a warlord claims his throne.
    • Pile high the apple filling, like the bodies of vanquished foes.
    • Cover with the second half of the dough, sealing the fate of the captured.
    • Carve the symbols of Khorne into the crust, letting the steam escape like the dying breaths of enemies.
    • Anoint the crust with the beaten egg and sprinkle with sugar, like the glory of victory.
  4. The Final Conquest:

    • Bake in the fiery depths for 50 minutes, until the crust is as golden as the spoils of war and the filling bubbles with the rage of battle.
    • Let the pie cool, as the battlefield stills after the storm of war.

Feast upon this Blood-Soaked Apple Pie, a tribute to the glory and might of Khorne!

top 6 comments
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[-] ReveredOxygen@sh.itjust.works 7 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

> blood soaked apple pie
> no blood

[-] Smorty@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 10 months ago

Gotta love the ai generated image AND description... (I assuming it's AI, if not, please correct me. Cuz if it's human written: impressive)

[-] Itrytoblenderrender@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

It's GPT 4. I've First asked for an apple pie recipe. Then I told GPT to rewrite it from the view of khorne. Finally I asked to create a picture from the result.

[-] Smorty@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 10 months ago

Got 4 has image generation now? Huh, did t know that.

[-] VizualWarrior@sh.itjust.works 1 points 10 months ago

Imma add this to my pinterest collage

[-] uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 10 months ago

It looks like a dough press and artisan work by the baker that's doing the heavy lifting. For all we know it's just normal pie ingredients.

this post was submitted on 24 Dec 2023
97 points (100.0% liked)

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