I just realized who this coworker of mine reminds me of. It's not just your workplaces. Up until now I thought he looked somewhat similar to this previous coworker of mine, but now I can conclude that instead they both vaguely resemble Thom Yorke
i fucking knew it!
Holy shit!
I never knew anything about Thom Yorke, but I just googled him, and there's one where I work too!
I really needed this validation today. 2x makes it even sweeter.
OMG, I knew I wasn’t crazy!
There's almost always one guy who is "the omega worker," like the lowest person on the totem pole that everyone uses like a bar one can't cross. There has to be a "well, at least I am not THAT guy!" Opposite of the Alpha pack leader, this person is the other end. Yes, it's abusive in toxic environments, but it's nothing compared to the chaos that follows when that person leaves. The scramble to "not be at the bottom."
ew. like, I get what you’re describing, and I’ve heard about that before, but I suppose I’m fortunate to never have worked at a place like this. how awful that sounds, not only for the “Omega” person, but to work in an environment that encourages such hierarchical cliquery. because the worst part? th constant in-fighting, gossip, and tearing each other apart. the lies, the deceit…
ok, I hav worked at a place like this, I just realized. I must have repressed it— thank goodness, because I don’t think I could have lied convincingly for the jury at that arson trial...
The Jerry Gergitch effect
In my job we had a guy that we would joke was the cause of all our issues (he obviously wasn't and knew this, as we used to say it about things he hadn't even touched). He eventually left for to wanting a more stable job before getting a mortgage arrive we were on the way to going under (still fighting that to this day). Even though he's gone we still use him as reference to be like "I fixed what X broke". Sort of used now as a way to not actually blame anyone in the company for things. Things go wrong and we fix them, no point in actually blaming anyone.
Every manager Hannah I've ever met has been deeply troubled and unable to not make that everyone else's issue. Only manager ones though, regular Hannahs seem to be immune.
Don't @ me, stats don't lie Hannah.
everywhere I’ve wroked she’s been named “D”, and she’s had that insufferably phone high-pitch voice that says, “HIIIIIiiiiii”. and you just want to choke her.
Corporate accounts payable, this is Nina speaking. Just a moment
Me. I'm the guy. I freelanced a lot for a few years. Mostly part time multi-week/month gigs. Every new company that brought me in had a guy already there with my first name. Not a rare name, but not a common name either. Within two weeks of my start dates, those people would be fired. It happened three jobs in a row.
There can be only one
OP...is this your way of telling us that you look like Thom? 😜
But real talk, you just made me realize that one of the guys on my team looks way too much like Thom to ever not see it again now.
I’m cute, but I think Thom is cuter, so, no, I wouldn’t compliment myself like that.
But real talk, you just made me realize that one of the guys on my team looks way too much like Thom to ever not see it again now.
see? it’s not just me!
I’m cute, but I think Thom is cuter
Oh my God, I'm so sorry.
OK, he was
There's always some deeply emotionally insecure white guy. He's always a greedy, manipulative tyrant, even if he covers it with a veneer of kindness or generosity most of the time He's usually NOT the brightest bulb in the room, but he's usually the most cunning, which is not the same thing. He often doesn't understand the more complex aspects of the organization very well, if at all. He's usually his own worst enemy in terms of leadership, increasing productivity and maintaining team moral, something he seems completely oblivious to. He tends to take all the wrong lessons from various small crises, such as senior employees leaving or customers cancelling contracts. Everyone around him knows they're the wrong lessons, everyone except him.
The worst part about him, is everyone coddles him, humors him, and lets him believe his own bullshit all the time without calling him on it. This calcifies the worst aspects of his toxic behavior and hardens them to stone. He usually mistakes criticism or "insubordination" as jealousy of his success, and responds to it by being smug and patronizing.
At the end of the day, the workplace social contract is actually just as bad for that guy as it is for everyone else, at least in terms of his mental health and stability. It enables him to live in a bubble where his opinions are facts and his words are given more respect than they deserve. He also thinks the people around him like him and admire him a lot more than they do. And when it comes out that they don't, his feelings are hurt far beyond what's called for.
I'm sure he's not always white, that's just my experience. And I'm sure he's not always he, that's just also my experience. But it sure as hell IS my experience.
Read radical candour....
There's always that one person you suspect is some form of white nationalist, and it always ends up being the case.
Most companies I work for go downhill hard within three years.
Young thom or old thom? That’s unfortunate lol
Young thom or old thom?
good question!
it varies, but always with short hair, ca. OK Computer. but Thom, even in his 20s, always had that “15 or 50?” look.
lol… I wanna guess….
IT or warehouse distribution?
Or something that involves a forklift! 🤞🏻
oooo, you’re good. I have had all 3 of these as former/current careers/jobs (including others), although I've never actually driven a forklift, despite them being present at my workplace. (I refuse to pee in a cup so I can get certified to operate them.)
Hahaha!! Oh Thoms of many talents!! I guess it’s all slightly better than old thom scouring my daughters internet history.. if its all post LA peroxide thom and pre homeless thom, they are fairly harmless I suppose 🤷🏻♂️ (and haha, I feel ya on the peeing in a cup)
I’m from NYC, where it’s now illegal to pee test for the MJ unless it’s something like operating have equipment or driving something, etc. But I’m in FL at the moment, so, while I have a Medical Cannabis card, it’s… a bit touchy here. Employers can discriminate if they want, but it’s hit-or-miss when it comes to “official policy” and enforcement, and even weirder when it comes to medical card exceptions.
I’m not giving anyone a reason to pee test me because I have legitimate need for it medically. I have serious joint pain and severe panic attacks unless I maintain a base level. No BS. I’m in my mid-40s, and, while I like getting ripped sometimes, I mostly just smoke to get chill and to make my knee and shoulder stop screaming with pain. and my back. Ibuprofen and Neproxin Sodium upset my stomach. Xanax is extremely addictive and I would likely abuse it.
One more step up the ladder is one I don’t come down from..
This hits on many levels friend! I hope somehow you end up leap frogging that shit and just being fortunate to skip that step in your pay grade aspirations! (Presuming the desire is linked to higher rate of pay and not a yearning to operate heavy machinery)
you’re nice.
have a nice day
just to add to this I have worked at one more than one of the big fang tech companies and have traveled to multiple sites around the globe and now I'm thinking back I can confirm that I can identify at least 10 Thom Yorke's at each company. you are blowing my mind tonight.
no more than my mind is blown than knowing im not alone. for over 25 years I’ve thought I’ve been going crazy. to know I’m not alone has shook the foundations of my world.
more than that: at least 1-1.5% of this world may be vague Thom York clones.
and I’m ok with that.
You just described 75% of jobs.
TIL - Imma 25 percenta
75%.. worldwide? I nailed it! 💪🏻
Every job I’ve had in the last 35 years has had a guy that looks like Robson Green, which is weird, because I only found out who he is a few years ago.
When talking on the phone or in a video call, there's always someone that would make this "tshh, tshh, tshh, tshhhhhhh" sound while they look something up on their computer or notes.
My last 3 jobs the company got bought out while I was working there. I've really only had one (non-internship) job where the company didn't get bought and that was a door to door sales job for one summer in high school
How did that go? My company is in the process of getting bought.
I've been through it many times and expect to see many more. Both as the subject of an acquisition and as an acquiree. You just have to wait and see. If they're not immediately closing you down, there will be a transition period. Months to a year or more. That's where you need to be looking for a new job if that seems like a remotely feasible option.
With regard to your personal decision, do not trust what you're being told. The company wants a smooth transition and that means that the company wants to be the one making the decisions about who is working for them. They can and will lie.
The exception to this is if they ask you to stay on while they close out operations at your site. In that case they've already lowered the hammer, you're on borrowed time anyway, and it doesn't matter to them.
(Also - if you're given this option, consider it carefully before accepting. The folks I know who have done this have described it as a depressing and completely unpleasant experience. They all claimed they wouldn't do it again. If you choose to do so, ask for more money to compensate for the therapy you'll need afterwards. Be bold with your offer because it's a job that very few want to do.)
Generally speaking, the first thing that should happen is that the new company will harmonize efficiencies. This means cutting redundant departments, projects, or products. Expect to see a lot of strangers on site who are evaluating this. Non-specialized departments like finance, HR, legal, and support IT will be merged and streamlined. And do not expect that the highest performing department will survive. It's often the cheapest one who does. If the team in Kentucky can do a good enough job, it makes no sense for them to retain a higher paid workforce in DC. I've seen that sort of thing happen. (It's also sometimes a selling point for the company being bought. 🤮)
After that, it just depends on 1) why they bought you and 2) what they thought they were buying. If they find out that part of the acquired company isn't something they want but is valuable enough to re-sell rather than shut down, you may be in for a head-spinning transition between several buyers.
Overall -
The experience is a big shake-up, but I've gone through eight or so unscathed as a mid level employee. It all depends on lots of things outside of your control. It will help if you can accept that these things are beyond your control or beyond your ability to foresee. I can also assure you that there's a good probability that the people in charge won't be making good or sensible decisions.
Expect to see many of your co-workers jump ship, but that's not always a bad thing. Sometimes it's the kick in the ass that people need to make a change. That's often a very good thing.
Thank you for the detailed response, this is way more than I expected and super helpful!
Every single place I have ever worked at had a guy with some form of the name "Priit". That was also the case for school.
I always have a Matt Damon!
He looks like a british Joe List.
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