If moons were cats, most planets would be the typical cat dad/mum, and Jupiter would be that crazy old neighbour with too many of them.

...wait a minute considering how our Moon developed, even moon adoption is cat-like! You don't say "I want a moon", the moon just hits you and say "you know what, I'm living here now!"

Not shown: Jupiter occasionally tearing one apart and strewing its innards all around or abducting random passerbys and eating them.

Mars's kids are named Fear and Terror. Not the best parent material there.

Don’t forget Saturn’s 145 moons!

but a bitch ain't one

"I got too many dang moons"

Now are those moon little humans with limbs and a face or are those moon embryos

Confirmed as in paternity test?

Does that mean Kamoʻoalewa is a bastard child?

I would take one it it came along but the process of getting my first moon... not again

QI | How Many Moons Does Earth Have?

Edit oh wait that was just one time when they asked.

Here's a collection:

How Many Moons

Lol, those moons better watch out. They've gone over the number 10! They'll be reclassified as minor moons at any moment now.

(Yes, I still think reclassifying Pluto as a minor planet is scientific bullshit.)

Jupiter and Saturn are laughing their "G"asses off at us. Look at that stupid little pea-sized earth with its single puny moon. And they can't even get a lander on it upright!!!