Don't drink anymore, but a walk under the starlight used to be my fav. And if you've got a long walk home you're basically sober by the time you show up

one time I blacked out and woke up to a spotlessly clean kitchen and a loaf of perfectly baked rosemary bread. I didn't even have rosemary

They missed the "Drunk me keeps buying sober me presents from the Internet".

I'm the "guess I'm crying now" kind of drunk.

I get to have the novel experience of ✨being tired✨ whenever I get drunk

I don't see "I am smart enough to know I can't drive but dumb enough to think I can walk to Taco Bell from here"

(Not that I know anyone like that personally.)

And sometimes you get to try out all of them! In one night!

Oh. Oh, man. I'm not the only one....

(#4)

Many of us have been each of those types of drunks.

i saw a t-shirt in a Mexican tourist town once that said it depends on what you drink, and it explained it like this:

Beer = I'm invincible!
Whiskey = I'm invulnerable!
Tequila = I'm invisible!

If the drinking goes on long enough, I will go through all of these phases.

these are the three personalities of my ADHD

Then there is me, alone in the basement, surrounded by 270 empty beer cans about to open my last 30 case of Bush light.

Suddenly the music video for Korpiklaani - Man with a Plan makes a lot more sense.

You start off as panel 1 then as you get more drunk you turn into panel 2 and after even more drinking you're panel 4.

I'm the wanderer.

Terrible story, I went to a foreign city with some friends and got black out on tequila for the first and last time. Apparently I left our motel without letting anyone know to go perform urban parkour. I somehow failed to clear a 2nd floor jump and based on the imprint in my one shoe, landed entirely with my right heel. Clean break.

My phone log showed that instead of calling anyone I was with or maybe medical assistance, I tried to call my boss 3 times before giving up entirely. I only have memory of some nurses later asking if I wanted to go to a hospital, but I denied them and slept it off. Guess I was found eventually, lol.

What about the ones who get belligerent, try to fight the cops that get called than puke on the cops as they're being arrested?

I’m the first and last and occasionally the other two

Then there’s the “time for coke” type of drunk that turns into all three with a pinch of murdering rage

I am both the first and the fourth one.

I'm the only one that becomes very philosophical when drunk?

I have levels.

I start off with "I love everyone", wanna talk.

Then comes losing my shirt, and if encouraged, I will find a table and lose more.

After that I hit the "walk in the woods" point. Or, really, "I wanna find a nice high place to sit". Dunno why, but after a certain point, I just wanna get somewhere I can look down over a city or something. There's something magical about it. Here's all these twinkling lights, all these lives going about their night. Some going to work, some going out to get fucked up, some to get just fucked.

And there I am. My own twinkling light, out in the night. Small, insignificant, just the red glow of the cherry of a cigarette against the nothingness. For a brief moment, I am both a part of that grander light, and apart from it. Above us, all the lights in the sky, bringing it together.