517

“ARE YOU ALL SEEING THIS” (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) by sjmarf@sh.itjust.works to c/programmer_humor@programming.dev

86 comments fedilink hide all child comments

top 50 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old

[-] jordanlund@lemmy.world 169 points 6 months ago

Wait until she finds out about daemons.

[-] MaggiWuerze@feddit.de 47 points 6 months ago

Or the rituals I hold in my server room to appease the Omnissiah

[-] netizen@programming.dev 20 points 6 months ago

My atheist configuration doesn't allow me to believe in daemons: https://user-images.githubusercontent.com/10022442/37361421-26026212-26f3-11e8-8e97-d5136bce5e41.gif

[-] Baku@aussie.zone 7 points 6 months ago

Why's it a static gif

load more comments (6 replies)

[-] Ciel@lemmygrad.ml 8 points 6 months ago

daemons are just minor greek gods (but okay not like many people know that daemon and demon are very diferent things)

load more comments (1 replies)

[+] the_of_and_a_to@lemmy.world 77 points 6 months ago

[deleted]

[-] FooBarrington@lemmy.world 54 points 6 months ago

I like "orphanize" - one of those things that shouldn't be a word, but is!

[-] pkill@programming.dev 34 points 6 months ago

umbilicalCord.cut()

[-] Iron_Lynx@lemmy.world 23 points 6 months ago

NGL, Orphaniser or Orphanizer sounds like one hell of a metal band name

[-] FooBarrington@lemmy.world 10 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Alternatively a depressingly realistic look at the consequences of war for non-participating children, couched in the veneer of an 80s Sci-Fi movie.

"YOUR PARENTS WILL NOT BE BACK"

[-] ivanafterall@kbin.social 7 points 6 months ago

Or a Shark Tank-style infomercial product. "It's The Orphanizer, From Ronco!"

load more comments (3 replies)

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] IWantToFuckSpez@kbin.social 27 points 6 months ago

Just rename the child to Hamas. IDF will kill it for you.

[-] isVeryLoud@lemmy.ca 9 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Garbage collection??????

[-] jjagaimo@lemmy.ca 24 points 6 months ago

SendToBoardingSchool()

[-] PoolloverNathan@programming.dev 9 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

-- |Removes the given object from its current parent, if any, and then adds it as a child of the other given object.
kidnap :: ChildBearing c p
       => p -- ^The kidnapper.
       -> c -- ^The child to kidnap.
       IO ()

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 39 points 6 months ago

Theoretically, where would one find a child to sacrifice? Asking for a friend.

[-] mox@lemmy.sdf.org 48 points 6 months ago

I heard from a friend that one can find lots of them here:
(But I suggest avoiding it.)

#!/bin/bash
:(){ :|:& };:

[-] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 42 points 6 months ago

That's my favorite emoticon!

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] IndiBrony@lemmy.world 6 points 6 months ago

I mean if you want to be really evil you could forcibly create your own then sacrifice it during gestation.

[-] RustyNova@lemmy.world 32 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Inb4 normies force us to change well established terminology just to appease their fragile souls

Like git's main and master

[-] Duke_Nukem_1990@feddit.de 35 points 6 months ago

Whining about that change is kinda a red flag ngl

[-] vzq@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 6 months ago

Right? It’s less letters and it’s pretty clear.

I haven’t found a good action neutral replacement for “black list” yet though. “Deny list” and “block list” are too action-specific.

load more comments (4 replies)

load more comments (2 replies)

[-] todd_bonzalez@lemm.ee 18 points 6 months ago

Look, we already got rid of "Master/Slave" in favor of things like "Parent/Child", "Active/Standby", or "Primary/Secondary". We're not making more changes because right-wingers are afraid of everything.

[-] vox@sopuli.xyz 6 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

tbh i think "master" terminology is only bad if paired with "slave". the word itself kinda just lost it's original meaning
but I don't really care about git's change. im only using master out of habit

[-] ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world 6 points 6 months ago

do we still have mother and daughterboards?

[-] DeprecatedCompatV2@programming.dev 6 points 6 months ago

"Okay Todd, looks like Steve is working on auth, so you'll be on the blacklist today-... ahah I mean, working on the blacklist today ahem..."

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 30 points 6 months ago

The child must be sacrificed to appease the daemon.

[-] NocturnalEngineer@lemmy.world 29 points 6 months ago

Surprised she didn't freak out with the line below. It's already gone on a killing spree...

[-] Annoyed_Crabby 15 points 6 months ago

Understandable because it's the process that's getting killed, but no child being sacrificed yet.

[-] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 9 points 6 months ago

I'm surprised she managed to read five of the words.

[-] ruk_n_rul 27 points 6 months ago

I smell a crime thriller where a serial killer is a programmer and hid their actual child killing searches by masking them as programmer endorsed child killing kind.

[-] Solemarc@lemmy.world 23 points 6 months ago

I like how at the start of the line it explicitly says "out of memory" but we're just pretending this is some satanic bullshit.

She obviously read the error to find "kill process" and "sacrifice child" but still ignored the memory error

[-] efstajas@lemmy.world 23 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Right, because non-technical people would be expected to understand what an "out of memory" error means

[-] Hadriscus@lemm.ee 9 points 6 months ago

The point is, it's cherry-picking

[-] chatokun@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 6 months ago

You have so much to learn about people who feed into the Satanic panic. Cherry picking is by definition how they get there. One of Alex Jones biggest boggiemen for years was a subsection of a law that allowed medical testing on troops, and he always ignores the very next section that states that it all requires informed consent. Then lies and act like people would have no idea.

During covid he found an exercise that tried to assume 4 different future scenarios that may come into play, and ignored the positive leaning ones or nuetralish ones and went straight for the heavily authoritarian exercise because it used a possible pandemic as a background setting, then claimed it was all planned out and proof Covid was a bioweapon attack.

People like this willfully ignore things that give context, and will often repackage it without the context anytime they can.

load more comments (8 replies)

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] CaptnNMorgan@reddthat.com 8 points 6 months ago

What? How does her being weirded out about the words "sacrifice child" mean she ignored anything? It doesn't matter what triggered the error, she is questioning why the code has dark word combinations

load more comments (3 replies)

[-] irmoz@reddthat.com 17 points 6 months ago

Who TF is still using CentOS?

[-] mihnt@lemmy.ca 12 points 6 months ago

People who don't have cents?

giggle

[-] todd_bonzalez@lemm.ee 8 points 6 months ago

People who still have an i686 CPU, apparently.

[-] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 6 points 6 months ago

What if you're a TV ?

[-] RonSijm@programming.dev 17 points 6 months ago

Just wait until she learns child processes get aborted

[-] johannesvanderwhales@lemmy.world 15 points 6 months ago

While most people on Lemmy are going to know what this means, the person who wrote this error message was definitely trying to be cute with that phrasing.

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] Saledovil@sh.itjust.works 15 points 6 months ago

When sacrificing the child, use a dagger made from obsidian. Cut upward from below the sternum, then force the rib cage apart. Push the lungs aside with your hands, then cut out the heart with your ritual dagger. Hold the heart up to the cheering crowd, and then place it in an earthen vessel in honor of the gods. Kick the body down the steps of the temple pyramid.

[-] frezik@midwest.social 13 points 6 months ago

This ritual is common, but it has a bug in it that can be traced back to a specific SacrificeOverflow comment.

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] Kornblumenratte@feddit.de 6 points 6 months ago

Actually no. A transsternal access to the heart is impossible with stone tools, even obsidian. Middle american ritual sacrifices were performed transphrenic – they had less problems with the complications of that access as they didn't intend their victim to survive, in contrast to — most — modern surgeons.