My MIL once gave me her old bathrobe as a Christmas gift. Don't think you can say how little you think of someone in gift form better than that. Yes I am serious. So I bought her a 10 dollar coffee gift pack and left the price tag on the next year.

Holiday postcard from a place he doesn't like saying

Wish you were ~~here~~ there

Dead fish 🐟

Any of these passive aggressive comments and in addition something for yourself. Because you deserve it.

I didn't think Father's Day gifts were that much of a standard thing. Most I've ever done is a text and maybe taking him to dinner or golfing.

So a "happy father's day" card if you need to get something

A "best dad" mug, but you cross out the "best"

I recommend ghosting.

If he asks you about it, re-ghost him (oh I forgot? Anyways...).

"World's Best Dad" mug with the word "Best" crossed out?

A “World’s Okayest Dad” mug.

Alternatively, a certificate for a free vasectomy.

Give him a very basic and cheap toolkit you know he already has. Firstly, he already has those tools and secondly he assumes you doubt his ability due to the cheapness of the tools. Like giving a Michelin chef a dollar store copper knife, they'd assume you think they can't cook.

Something like a 2 pack of a Phillips and flathead screwdriver. So common even non DIY people always have them, and so cheap that they are useless.

Kind of hard to explain but hopefully that gets the pount across.

Socks 💯💯

A fathers day card from the dollar store. Include a gift card from the same dollar store. Put no money on the gift card.

Football merch in his least favorite team.

Something nice, that he likes.

Anything else and you are definitely not trying to keep the drama at bay.

The same tie you gave him last year.

Put some bedbugs and fleas in his house.