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green man
I'm in the firm belief that Amish are crazy but harmless.
Mormons are not that. Mormons are a modern organization, and one that is ruthless and demanding of its followers, and with funding to spare.
Last I checked the LDS have actual industrial arms manufacturering capacity.
This is the real answer, there are soooo many Mormon gun companies and defense contractors it's fucking wild.
A not insignificant one at that.
Mormons. They already have an army of ~70k extremely impressionable 18-20 year olds (missionaries) hopped up on dirty sodas and sexual repression ready to do whatever for their prophet in the name of god.
Source: was Mormon, was missionary, still live in Utah. lol
Hwat is dirty soda
Soda with mix ins. Like flavor mix ins. So you go to a soda shop, ask for a Dr Pepper, then get like vanilla, coconut, or raspberry, etc mix ins. Kinda like an Italian soda. It’s huge here in utah.
First off, you guys have soda shops? Is it all 50s theamed?
Nah, most of them are just modern soulless rectangle buildings with little or no interior decorations. I’ve only been inside one a few years back tho. However most people just use the drive through and line up like 50 cars deep and block traffic and access to other surrounding buildings like the lemmings they are, lol
I moved here from NY and it surprised me. I think it's because they can't have coffee and such, so they drink a ton of soda. Coffee bad, but a 44 oz Coke at 8am, totally fine.
Homie could you imagine Amish Guerrilla Warfare? Those dudes are so down to earth you'd think it was straight up the earth that attacked you. They dont even need GPS to know where they are. Mormons are gonna need some huge advantage other than their thug stratagem to beat the Amish Will.
Quite honestly, I think the Amish would find a lot of collaborators. As a former Mormon, I'd be happy to help the Amish out in some way.
Amish guerilla agents coming out of literally every tree, bush, patch of vegetation imaginable
Images going to bed in an Mormon military base and waking up that, surprise, the Amish build a prison camp around you during the night
They dont even need GPS to know where they are.
Inhales
The Amish knows where it is at all times. It knows this because it knows where it isn't. By subtracting where it is from where it isn't, or where it isn't from where it is (whichever is greater)...
In the first week, the Mormon airforce rises into the air and starts a carpet bombing campaign.
Seemingly, the Amish are destroyed as there are no signs of fighting back. The Mormon missionaries move in to pacify the newly conquered territory. But all the towns are dead and empty.
After two weeks of raising the Mormon flags everywhere, the top brass gets a notice: several Amish towns have sprung up in the hinterlands. Quickly the Mormon army rushes in but all they find are desolated settlements.
General after general gets burn-out from this game of whack-a-mole. The Mormons want a fight but the pacifist Amish aren't playing along. The Mormon youth gets dissatisfied with their rulers who called then into a war and are not delivering.
On the other side of the curtain, the Amish are not allowed to fight back. They simply leave their homes and rebuild somewhere else, especially in places the Mormon army just left. But some amongst them are of the opinion that, although fighting is strictly prohibited, a few accident should be within the rules.
So the numbers of unexplained explosions in the Mormon homeland start to rise. It's just the beginning, but the methane tanks on the Amish dairy farms overfloweth.
A Mormon officer suggests arming local cheese lords to get a hold of the situation. Wherever have we seen that before?
It's one of the rare examples that's almost the opposite of a population heat map.
Mormons. And it's over in a week, tops.
Mormons are really into guns on the whole. There's an entire fundie Mormon clan (the Kingstons) that own Desert Tech, an arms manufacturer. Mormons in general have a very high rate of enlistment in military services, while the Amish are pacifists and opposed to any form of modern technology. And don't forget that you have the Deseret Nationalists that are quite willing to murder for their religion.
Desert Tech
If the momos make DT rifles their standard issue, the Amish will win.
Mormons lose big, and here's why.
Those damn bright white shirts. Easy targets.
No way you can miss them, even on the smokiest battlefield.
The Amish blend into the background better.
I think I gotta hand it to the Amish on this one. I’ve seen how quickly they can build a barn. Imagine how quickly they could fortify a front. The Mormons just don’t have that capability. Not to mention the Mormon limited selection of hot drinks to drink on the cold bitter front. It would make it far more difficult to fight that war.
Now I want to see the Amish and the Romans trying to out-build each other on a battlefield.
The Mormon Church has historical experience in low-intensity conflict, has members surprisingly embedded in diplomatic circles, has experience in power projection, and is fucking rich.
Mormons aren't just going to be soaking, but soaking in Amish blood.
Gonna be like the Vietnam War. High tech powerful army vs low tech actually competent guerrillas. Amish gonna win.
The mor(m)ons would.
They use technology, and have an insanely huge bankroll.
didn't the amish already win, and that's why the mormons had to leave and go out west?
The Mormons have $182 billion in investments (that excludes operating assets). Just their stocks/mutual funds/etc. exceed $50 billion.
They could buy 14 aircraft carriers or 1,776 F-35s.
BREAKING NEWS: The Mormon Mountain Coalition has airdropped over a dozen aircraft carriers into the middle of Pennsylvania farmlands. The Amish Agrarian Alliance vows retaliation
I know not how we will fight WW3, but WW4 will be fought with magic underwear and beards with no mustache.
The Amish are pacifists and the Mormons have been involved in several wars so my bet is on the Mormons.
I'd fight alongside the Amish because they make nice ass furniture. I'll control the drones while they reload their muskets.
I don't think Mormons have shunned tech, have they? So Mormons.
Also
Regions with significant populations United States 6,868,793[2] Mexico 1,516,406[3] Brazil 1,494,571[4] Philippines 867,271[5] Peru 637,180[6] Chile 607,583[7] Argentina 481,518[8] Guatemala 290,068[9]
I had no idea it was so prevalent outside of the US.
After the trade embargo, the mormans will run out of furniture. They'll have no tables to eat from, no chairs to sit on, no beds to sleep on. After a month the mormans will be exhausted and starving and ready to topple over with a single flick.
Mormons hands down, they're more strapped than you think and have no compunction against modern weapons whereas afaik the amish probably stop somewhere before the 1900s. Plus they could maybe convert some of the Amish (wololo), they're good at that and the Amish don't bother.
The Amish are strict pacifists (except in regards to domestic violence) so they can’t even have a sword
Amish in a sweep, their toughness outweighs mormon tech advantages and let's not forget their Mennonite buddies.
Mormons, it will be a short war but a long and bloody flight, and some Amish resistance cells will operate for decades after
If the Amish can somehow detonate a large enough EMP, they’re in with a chance.
If bloodlusted, Amish easily. They're tougher than the nails they're holding their barns up with, and not prone to complaining. In reality though, they're big softies. They won't even participate in haggling unless a deal is hurting them. Watching my mom haggle with an Amish dude for dog studding service is easily the most cringe moment of my life. I had to make her greedy ass stop!
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