Ok I think I've got it.

Jesus is like Voltron, the 3 dudes in the middle combine to form him.
And the 2 on the ends are the spiritual equivalent of two men each, which is why all the parts of Jesus are hanging out with them.

Jokes ~~ab~~o~~ut l~~o~~ss~~ o~~f life are neve~~r funny

That better be a bidet, because there isn't enough room to wipe in there

Skinny pants are impossible to put on and remove when it's hot.
And don't talk to me about the swamp ass from squished butt cheeks all day.

My only excuse is that I just woke up and my eyes were still bleary.

Wait... Does this mean we can get some Lemonussyade?

This is the most Canadian bedroom I've ever jeen

Delete this right now.

Not the post, the ice cream flavour.

Having never read it, it reminds me vaguely of Douglas Adams

Take it to the next level and poison the image so that AIs don't think it's even a representation of a pipe

Well... IDK what else could have possibly gotten my wife's attention, because I'm sure AF not hot or cool.

Waterproof zippers exist, and are already often used in raincoats. Much more robust and easier to use than Ziploc.

High ~~paced~~ blood pressure, from all the sedentary work