Goddamn that is well done. I can read it in their voices perfectly; I even hear the dice roll in my head.

I second this

Turn on debate

Donald Trump is talking about immigrants eating people's pets

News anchor gives the most limp dick correction I've ever heard

Trump just doubles down and says that they're definitely eating pets

Kamala's turn, she laughs and goes "wow, talk about extreme!"

I fucking hate this country. We deserve every bad thing coming to us. I hate it so much.

I gotta work like 50 hours in the next four days and I'm pretty sure I just got food poisoning

If the non-voting leftist demographic had as much power as all of the various "leftist" reddit subs thought they had, we would be a lot closer to actually taking meaningful political action in this country.

I'm so tired of people looking at the most anemic political group in the country and screeching about how they're going to tip over the entire cruise ship.

Make sure you bring out the unseasoned potato salad when he shows up at the BBQ 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Inside sources say there were no protestors, the bugs just appeared

What's the timeline until someone introduces legislation to make it illegal to work from home?

Dems fuck it up and hire a sniper who can shoot

Because to liberals, the most valuable human trait is politeness, and there's nothing more impolite than trying to assassinate your opponent.

They are literally afraid that the shooter is going to be a lib, because only the right are supposed to be the rabid extremists with unformed frontal lobes.

Protestors stopped traffic near jfk? How could anyone tell?

I have so many voodoo dolls to throw out