This post makes me irrationally angry. I see the world as this burning wreckage of human interaction. A decaying hell where suffering is not only rampant, but also the goal of those in power.

And you can't change it. You're not big enough to change thousands years of oppression, slavery, classism, eliteism. You're not big enough to rise above it. No one is. And every collective effort to bind together to change things gets squashed before it gains momentum.

A lot people are incapable of accepting the truth. A lot of people are uncomfortable hearing "you don't matter", then seeing the world around you, and knowing it's true. A lot of people can't accept that.

But I have. Decades ago. Seeing how things play out, not only for me, but also people like me. I'm nothing special. I never suggested I was. I just grew up being taught that everybody is worthy of being happy.

Then you grow up, and notice that nobody is happy. Everywhere around you is depression, anxiety, fear, and despair. It's inside your instinct to fight the core concept of hate, and racism. To defeat not the racists, but the very foundational core concept of racism itself.

And the more you spend your teenage years trying to spread this message of love and acceptance, the more your message is defeated. Not by some elitist opposition who sabbotages your words. Rather from ears of apathy. An entire society that has collectively agreed that this is what the human experience is meant to be.

So you begin to accept the fact that you are nothing. Life is nothing. The very construct of happyness is a myth that you never have felt, and never will feel. No one has.

And just as you accept that premise for the past 2 decades.......you see this image. A pure image. In that moment, the puppy is happy. The kitten is happy. Everyone observing is happy. This is what happy is. This proves the concept of happy is real.

Which then pisses me off that I live in THIS world where it's next to impossible to find happyness!!!

GAAAHHH!!!!!

flips a table on the way out