I fucking love anchovies! I just made a fried pizza with anchovies the other day!

If your supermarket has them pick up some premade dough, stretch out whatever size you want that will fit in the pan you have, and deep fry that mother for a minute or so until it's golden, flip and repeat. Then after that's done I top it with sauce, anchovies, onion, and mozzarella and put it under the broiler until the cheese gets a little browned.

Idk if it still classifies as shitty food but it's damn good and really easy.