I love this idea...but for some reason even if I get the right amount of sleep, if I wake up early I always feel like microwaved roadkill. :(

The feeling rushed and forced in the morning thing really hits though. That probably lead to me being chronically late. (By literally 1 minute. As in 60 seconds...but apparently that was enough for them to "talk to" me about it. Ugh.)

Why can't I wake up at 9:00 and do nothing until noon, like I usually do?

I know this wouldnt work for me but absolutely please if you're unhappy with your mornings or evenings try different sleep schedules within what your obligations allow.

Doesn't have to be getting up at 5, for me I'd ideally go to bed there but since my job doesn't allow me to start in the afternoon, I've found that showering in the evening and getting up at 8 to then be able to just get ready and go to work in <15 minutes works great. I'm a zombie after waking up until I get some exercise anyway, so after cycling to work I'm fine and I just need to minimize the effort needed before that.

Get up late, or wake up in the middle of the night to get all your free time before work instead of after, prepare everything you can before bed or take all your time in the morning. But if you feel like what you're doing right now sucks, try something else if at all possible.