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this post was submitted on 04 Aug 2025
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Chapotraphouse
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What’s the hexbear line on misandry? Or at least a US specific version. It seems like a reasonable response
I can't speak for HB, but 99.9999% of references to ""misandry"" are stupid bullshit, but it's conceptually valid when talking about individuals or very small, divergent, and rare social alcoves. I think corvidenjoyer's argument's real conclusion is that the patriarchy itself is surely the primary producer of ""misandry,"" though it's just observably false that that's the only way to conceive of people having an irrational and reactionary hatred of people on the basis of those people being men, though the patriarchal kind is overwhelmingly the most common and accepted, and the only one that's really useful to try to analyze on a systemic level that exceeds talking about like an obscure clique of marginally misguided radfems, who all together do not represent even a small fraction of the hate that men direct at each other and themselves on a patriarchal, "toxic masculinity" basis.
I don't like calling it ""misandry"" because I don't think it should be equivocated with misogyny, which is the only reason that the term exists to begin with. The two are not socially similar at all and their impacts on society are very different.
I don't really think "toxic masculinity" is a helpful term either, because gender as a moral construction is itself toxic and "positive masculinity" is just "being a good person" and has nothing to do with being a man. I don't care what people do with the aesthetics of gender, that's not my business, I'm only talking about it as a system of non-aesthetic values.
yeah there's nothing good in western culture that's characteristic of men/masculinity and not just an everybody thing.
I really meant it when I said "gender as a moral construct is itself toxic," because once it is conceptually unmoored from sex (as it should be), you can't make any coherent idea about what is actually good or bad that is particular to one gender, no matter the culture, because what's left is either aesthetic (which I'm indifferent to) or an explicitly reactionary pigeon-holing. It's good for anyone to be empathetic; it's good for anyone to, within their means, protect others; it's good for anyone to, within their means, provide for others who can't provide for themselves; etc. None of this is specifically about western culture, it is about all of humanity, including western culture.
(Even with gender moored to sex, you can ultimately make similar arguments, but this one is simpler and the added premise is one that everyone here agrees with, so I'm just sticking to that)
i think marginalized genders have more coherence because of the resistance component but i can't speak to identifying with a particular set of vibes because i don't experience anything i could recognize as gender.
What do you believe it is ethically positive for marginalized genders to do that it is not ethically positive for cis men to do?
resist, but i didn't mean ethics when i said coherent. i mean that marginalization creates something that has more grounding in reality, and this idea is probably downstream of writings on racism and applies to other axes of marginalization.
Not real. There is no person alive today that can even concieve of an example of "misandry" that isn't entirely based on what the ideal man is desired to be under patriachy thus reinforcing that superstructure. Its same as "anti-white racism" essentially.
I think there's something there, but I have a hard time figuring it out because my personal experiences are muddled by transness. Like being excluded from social contexts because I was a guy hurt really really bad but idk how much of that is tied up in being being othered by a group I didn't know I wanted to be a part of versus the "standard" distress
the things that harm men and people society views as men are all just capitalism and patriarchy (and homo/a-/transphobia as applicable). the intersections with race and disability are focused on in those domains rather than a general mens liberation framework that probably only exists as that subreddit.
nobody does anything about "mens' issues" in a way that accomplishes anything for men, including the grifters acknowledging some real problems but selling snakeoil or scapegoating women, the rich guys benefitting from abusing the rest of them, average men on the street, liberal feminists, and leftists.