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Shouts out to ?anova
(mander.xyz)
A place for majestic STEMLORD peacocking, as well as memes about the realities of working in a lab.
Rules
Wait until you find some nerd using SAS.
My day job uses SAS but I've used Stata and SPSS pretty extensively. SPSS is the most black-boxy out of all of them, but it's also easiest to use. I see why it's so popular in behavioral science; the math-heavy types tend not to go into psychology and similar.