105

yea

I did not expect this this post of mine to attract as many people minimising SA as it did. Bit of a downer, yeah.

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[-] NoLeftLeftWhereILive@hexbear.net 32 points 6 months ago

As a woman I can never know if a man will hurt me or not. It's really that simple. With a bear I am on a far safer (more predictable) ground.

A guy who had gotten this worded it this way for other guys: If, as a man, you leave a house late at night to walk somewhere, you do not have to prepare for assault mentally every time. You are relatively safe in the world by default. You don't carry keys in your hand etc. or exist with constant awareness of the steps behind you or with the need to scout if the men that walk past you are hostile or friendly. You don't have to adjust your behaviour to minimize the chances of getting jumped. It's a wholly different existance in the world that a man can't apparently comprehend. Men also tend to physically have the upper hand, there is no balance here.

Real life example, I stood outside a library, on the phone and minding my own business at about age 20 when an average looking guy walked into the same yard and started staring at me weird. Middle of the day, public spot. There were no other people around. He was just a guy.

I stayed on the phone, but became aware of the threat. Because that is what you do to stay safe. A moment later he tried to assault me. I was able to run inside to safety behind a locked door and this man did stuff behind the glass door while I was trapped inside that I don't want to repeat. This is what just happens, everyone I know has similar stories. This would not happen if I saw a bear in the woods.

And this kind of stuff becomes your life experienxe, that we can't talk about because mens feelings get hurt. I can't believe this has to be repeated in 2024...

I drove a taxi as a woman for some years, I was inappropiately approached and touched almost every night. By men. Every single male customer I had to scout and tiptoe around because you never know. Drunk men were especially unpredictable.

If you are a man and I am alone with you, I will consider you a bigger threat than I would a wild animal. Regardless of what you really are like. I can't know that. Best friends and close people rape women, beat women. Good guys go dark. We can't afford to not be aware of this in everyday life. It isn't about you persoally, but it is about men and the way men behave.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 3 points 6 months ago

minimize the chances of getting jumped

I grew up in some "sketchy" places and I have always had an instinct to keep my head up even as a guy and I know that must be ten times worse as a woman.

this post was submitted on 05 May 2024
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