111
submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) by weirdbeardgame@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[-] Skates@feddit.nl 4 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

First - pretty movie vampires were pretty humans before they got vampired. Second - why in the fuck would a necromancer raise a vampire with free will? Face it 'pretty' boy, you'll be stuck in a cave trying to kill adventurers who never visit. You'll be talking to rats after the first month of solitude. You'll lose your undeath virginity to a lost mountain goat. The first time a girl will be around your cave, she'll notice how it smells like a homeless man who hasn't changed his underwear in years and avoid the cave entirely. You'll feel like spiking yourself in the heart because you had gotten used to the smell, but you won't even be able to do that - you're a necromancer's minion. You have no choice in how you live or die. You're just a smelly guardian of an uninteresting cave.

I'll take undead drake. I'm doing some epic shit before I die, not just guarding some cave.

[-] thelsim@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 months ago

Those are a lot of assumptions you're making:

  • No one said the necromancer wanted a minion
  • No one mentioned anything about a smelly cave
  • I never said I'm a boy
  • Maybe I would love the solitude

Anyway, no one said that the necromancer needed a guardian for some smelly cave. I like to think the necromancer got lonely and just wanted a friend to chat with. Even if what you say is true, cave guarding is for low-level chumps like skeletons or ghosts. Vampires are middle-management at least :)

Also, how on earth can you tell me I have to look exactly like I did when I was alive - which is still pretty :P - while you apparently can transform from human corpse to a drake?
Following your rules, the necromancer would be trying to assemble a drake using human bones, creating some weird facsimile of a dragon. The "drake" would spend its time jumping out from behind rocks shouting "blergh", while falling apart at the slightest touch. Wishing some adventurer would put it out of its tortured existence instead of just pointing and laughing.

[-] Skates@feddit.nl 3 points 2 months ago

while you apparently can transform from human corpse to a drake

Did you just assume my species?

[-] thelsim@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 months ago

Fair enough :)

this post was submitted on 25 Aug 2024
111 points (93.0% liked)

Ask Lemmy

26749 readers
532 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS