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Revelations
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this post was submitted on 10 Aug 2023
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please use hydrogen and not helium if you do this.
Helium is a precious, essential, non-renewable resource that the world is actually running out of.
Now I'm just imagining them coming back down, combusting, and people thinking the war of Armageddon has begun.
Is this why I can't just go to the party store and buy hydrogen filled balloons?
Yes, you really don't want an unplanned indoors Hindenburg reenactment because someone got too close to the birthday cake. Also it's difficult to store
But easy to make.
St Peter checked them at the gates and all got sent back
"The fuck made you think Paul was so important?! The dude was one of the false prophets Jesus warned about, you morons!" -St. Peter, probably
Better yet, attach a small explosive to them so once they get enough attention and people think the rapture is coming they suddenly burst into flames and explode.
That way the Christians really won't know what to think.
"God works in mysterious, explosive ways."
That's something I find funny. The second most abundant element in the universe and we're running out of our supply.
It's not a laughing matter. The world used to be He He He He He He He but soon there'll be no more He He He.
Because we don't have spaceships to go out into the universe to collect it, so all we have is what has been trapped in deposits underground.
and a lot of it has been wasted on stupid shit like party balloons, and the overwhelming majority of the population does not understand how critically important helium is to manufacturing and medicine.
I don't know, but I feel like the party industry pales in comparison to industrial users. Do you have any reliable numbers?
@state_electrician @Dubious_Fart, the most abundant element in the universe, not renevable, is human stupidity
You're right but the real advice is: just don't do this at all. These balloons pollute our oceans and forests.
Fuck the ocean, everything in there is scary and dangerous, we should nuke the sharks. Mostly /s
The height of "edgy" in the Eighties was a "Nuke a Gay Whale for Jesus" bumper sticker.
we've already done that. mostly. no /s unfortunately
What could go wrong.
Don't cover the sex dolls in what amounts to thermite and you should be fine.
https://www.airships.net/hindenburg/disaster/myths/
Some cathing fire would probably help sell it: those poor sinners didn't get in!
Scarcity smarcity - do it so you can attach tiny timed fireworks to them, at the feet so they float upright and then EXPLODE at like 1000 feet
Just release them far away from any power lines
Eh? Can't we just pull it from the air?
No, its literally lighter than air. it floats out into space, and it is not in a dense enough concentration where its possible to reharvest anyway.
No, there's not enough in the atmosphere