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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by mizu6079@lemmy.world to c/nostupidquestions@lemmy.world

I prefer regular foods that help with constipation, not meds.

UPDATE: I forced the shit out somehow

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[-] ViridianNott@lemmy.world 27 points 1 year ago

Try not pooping for 3 days. This tricks your body into no longer being constipated

[-] mizu6079@lemmy.world 27 points 1 year ago

That's what got me constipated in the first place.

[-] ditherwither@lemmy.world 24 points 1 year ago

Yo, didn't notice it was the same person

This is hilarious

[-] NewWorldOverHere@kbin.social 3 points 1 year ago

The profile picture is super memorable to me, for some reason.

[-] BloodyFable@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

WHERE'S THE EXPLANATION OF YOUR SIN.

[-] mizu6079@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago
[-] ChanchoManco@kbin.social 15 points 1 year ago

So I'm going to assume the no poop mission was a success.

[-] mizu6079@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

It sure was. The resulting constipation was hell though.

[-] mizu6079@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago

I managed to force the shit out somehow thanks everyone.

[-] rkk@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

I am happy for your achievement. Well done!

[-] hyveltjuven@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago

So are we going to get an explanation on the 3 poopless days?

[-] mizu6079@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

Sorry but I really can't 🥲

[-] Boozilla@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

I love these posts. But Imma be pissed off if we find out mizu is Gallowboob or some fucker like that from reddit.

[-] mizu6079@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

mizu is what

[-] EuroNutellaMan@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

So you gave yourself constipation in order to not poop for 3 days... can you tellbus what you were doing now?

[-] ThatGirlKylie@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

I’m so confused on this dudes post history. Intentionally clearing himself out and giving himself constipation but with access to toilets and an air conditioned tent??

This is either the biggest shitpost ever or some kind of evacuation fetish.

Shits crazy.

[-] Drusas@kbin.social 6 points 1 year ago

I'll just say that there's a reason for the old people eating prunes stereotype.

[-] Bishma@social.fossware.space 5 points 1 year ago

The classic way I know of is a large black coffee and a bran muffin. If you can manage to get stuck in traffic about an hour after you eat, it increases the odds of it working.

[-] DarraignTheSane@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Prune juice, coffee, and any spicy foods.

[-] mizu6079@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Thanks a lot imma try them all at once

[-] Chetzemoka@kbin.social 7 points 1 year ago

You joke, but old school nurses do just that: mix prune juice, coffee, and milk of magnesia. They call this combo "The Bomb" lol: https://drslusher.com/constipation-remedy-or-the-bomb/

I'm more inclined to tell you that while I appreciate your commitment to a natural remedy, Miralax (polyethylene glycol powder) is the most effective remedy in my personal experience as a nurse. For what it's worth.

[-] MajorMajormajormajor@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 year ago

Thanks for concluding the saga for us @mizu, it's been a wild ride.

[-] stevexley@kbin.social 4 points 1 year ago

My wife swears by dried apricots. Make sure you are in a well ventilated, prefeably unpopulated space as you are going to produce some gas that will make your eyes water.

[-] rarkgrames@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I’m utterly convinced at this point this dude is pranking us HARD. 🤣

[-] jugalator@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Long walks and much water. Also try eating prunes.

[-] PoodleDoodle@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

This is the way. Oatmeal or anything with high fiber will help as well.

However prunes or are really where it's at.

[-] Peruvian_Skies@kbin.social 3 points 1 year ago

Anything with lots of fiber, especially darker leaves like kale. The less cooked, the better. But a warm enema can also help a lot in a dire situation.

[-] ReCursing@kbin.social 3 points 1 year ago

You could try the mathematician's approach and work it out with a pencil!

(but yes, an enema and fibrebare the correct answers

[-] T156@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Xylitol, one of the common substitutes for sugar in sugar-free lollies has a laxative effect, so you might be able to munch on a pack of sugar-free gummies and shotgun it out your backside.

Whether your toilet will be in a usable state afterwards is another story altogether.

[-] jerrimu@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

I take kratom, an herb with opioid properties so I deal with this a lot. Prunes and other dried fruits have sugar alcohols, which work for a lot of people, coffee is ok. I take magnesium and fuller supplements, so try bananas and oatmeal if you wanna do this with just food.

[-] mizu6079@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Idk if that's available in my area but I'll try to look for it. Thanks.

[-] Teriyakiboy98@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Really hot peanuts help, look up your closest Indian grocery store they usually have the nuclear stuff.

[-] jg1i@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Big glass of regular cow milk.🥛

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[-] rkk@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

prune juice XD trust me

"It may be used as a dietary supplement to act as a laxative. " /wikipedia

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prune_juice

[-] mizu6079@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I'm gonna try to find it at the store when I go out. Thanks.

[-] the_wise_man@kbin.social 2 points 1 year ago

Real answer: Saline enema. Laxatives (prune juice), stimulants (coffee), and opioids (kratom) might help in some cases (actually probably not the opioids, those are likely to make it worse), but if your constipation is really severe and you want immediate relief then an enema is the way to go. You can pickup prefilled enema kits at most drug stores.

[-] FixedFun@kbin.social 1 points 1 year ago

I sadly had an enema, I hated it but it did make me feel better, now I just have IBS

[-] indetermin8@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Personally, I've found binge drinking to be the most fun way to clear yourself out.

After that, lots of greasy foods will grease up your insides.

[-] Periwinkledot@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Let me introduce you to my girl here. 😁 Acupressure Points For Constipation

[-] smokinjoe@kbin.social 2 points 1 year ago

Psyllium husk.

Not the most pleasant thing to mix with water, but god damn that poopy powder is incredible. It should be part of everyone's daily habit, it's so good for you.

[-] Dufurson@kbin.social 1 points 1 year ago

There is a saying in Spanish that says: "coffee and cigarette, mud doll" xD

[-] 567PrimeMover@kbin.social 1 points 1 year ago

That's beautiful. How do you say it in spanish?

[-] Dufurson@kbin.social 1 points 1 year ago

café y cigarro, muñeco de barro xD

[-] Fleppensteijn@feddit.nl 1 points 1 year ago
[-] cacheson@kbin.social 1 points 1 year ago

Triscuits and guacamole. Make sure to increase your fiber intake slowly, otherwise you'll make things worse.

[-] GilbertGarfield@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

I drank a heap of apple juice a couple of times I needed to. That helps me. Either that or cider.

Prune juice. Just be sure to clear your calendar and plan to spend the next couple of hours near a clean bathroom.

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this post was submitted on 28 Jun 2023
56 points (95.2% liked)

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