That press can really handle the pressure. What's the estimated PSI on that 4th panel? Looks like half of the volume has been compressed. Supercritical french press!
More impressed by that hand strength! Its takes a hand or two or a nuclear plant to compress a liquid!
Brought to you by Los Alamos Coffee.
Okay, so, I completed this impossible task. Now, how do I get coffee into my cup?
Aeropress users after reading this comic
I have a good used car worth of money tied up in my espresso stuff just so I can judge harder.
I really don't understand why people are so weird about coffee. And I don't mean "why are people so judgmental" I mean "why are people so weirdly defensive about it".
If you post a picture of a well done steak online people will verbally skin you alive.
People will travel to be able to go to some of the few restaurants with chefs that know how to prepare fugu without killing you.
People will pay hundreds, sometimes even thousands of dollars for certain alcoholic beverages.
And yet coffee is seen as this uniquely smug thing, even if you're pouring water into a $10 plastic funnel or mixing coffee grounds in a glass jar. Like, yeah, if you have $10,000 worth of equipment you're clearly a wealthy person with a hobby, but again, pour over and a French press is literally just a funnel and a jar respectively.
To be fair, consider the expansive global industry required to enjoy coffee. The supply chains for steak, fugu, and alcohol don't really compare. The fact that just about anyone in the global north can enjoy a coffee at any time of day for a few bucks really is a luxurious privilege.
Same goes for chocolate.
Both are more carbon intensive (by weight) than pork or chicken.
Sooo what I find funny is... all things considered, French Press isn't even that sophisticated; it doesn't involve adjusting the speed at which one pours the water, so it's a lot less technically demanding than using like a V60 or something... I think the last time I went to a coffee class the instructors were all scoffing at the French Press lol (including one of them not wanting to "waste" a really high-quality batch of coffee on a French Press)
Also James Hoffmann has an alternative technique for using a French Press that makes coffee that is less "muddy"... basically doing the same as usual, but after 4 minutes instead of plunging, try to us a spoon to remove all the foam, and then keep the coffee inside for another 5-10 min. Then pour out coffee without plunging
There's Melita-style and Chemex pourovers which is less demanding on the pouring techniques.
Also, a lot of people seem to use too fine of grind size for french press, which requires coarse grind.
Pour like 3/4 full, stir, then cover with a coffee filter (that's the same size as the French press) before filling the rest of the way.
It's similar to how a lot of japanese cooking tells you to scoop off the foam, or you can use coffee filters on top of your soup to catch the foam.
And at the end of the day, all hot brewing methods are still inferior to the stupidest patient person.
Cold brew is objectively better coffee, and literally just requires you to delay coffee satisfaction by like 15-20 hours.
I wonder if i can use fine powder to do it, sounds like something that might actually save me times in the morning
There is no objectivity in taste. Coffee drinking is a spectrum of preferences from flavor profiles delivered by growing, bean blending and roasting practices to acidity, particulate matter, strength, caffeine content, additives (milk/sugar/etc), and other subjectivity.
I personally don't enjoy most cold brews, or cold coffee in general, as cold coffee tends to allow more fruity flavors come through, which I do not enjoy at all in my coffee experience.
I however, would not turn down a cold brew if that's all that's available. I mean, hell, I'll drink a cup of black from a rundown diner that's brewed from folgers and been sitting on a hot plate for 30+ minutes. And if that's somebody's favorite cup of coffee, I'm not gonna judge them and tell them their coffee is inferior.
Moka pot supremacy gang rise up.
It's all bean water and the sanctimony people attach to any of it is weird.
It's also funny to make a comment about French presser users judging other coffee drinkers which inherently judges the french presser.
Again we are talking about the coffee maker as if it's the most important part in the quality of your coffee. It's also how you spot someone pretending to know coffee. Far more important are the beans. After the beans comes your grinder and water quality.
A connaisseur can enjoy every style of coffee making but never bad beans. Industrial type of coffee is mostly on the bad side btw..
The thing I miss most about using my French press.
Filtering your coffee through a paper filter removes the cafestol.
Cafestol makes coffee “bad” for you.
Cafestol is not really that well studied, and at least in rats it's an anticarcinogen.
I'd recognize that break room anywhere.
Pam, Stan, and Angela acting like one of her cats :D
You don't want to stir it. Agitation increases bitterness. If it isn't mixing well, pour slower.
I've been using the Stumptown method, which has you pour half the water, wait a minute, then there'll be a crust on top.. you want to break that crust with your spoon then give it a light stir. Then pour the other half of the water, wait til the 4 minute mark, press, and voila.
If you don't stir in that crust, you'll have unevenly brewed grounds. If you're getting bitterness from stirring, try a coarser grind.
That sounds like bs. Your slow pour is also agitating it
Nice judgment location
This is wrong. You need to steep in cold water for 24 hours.
I've got the best way to make coffee. You take the absolute cheapest instant coffee you can find, and a bit of salt to make it palatable. My grandpa says they made it like that when he visited Vietnam, so it must be pretty fancy, right?
I have a French Press and I like the convenience of it. I can make my coffee even if the power is out and I don't need to buy filter cups.
No scale, no grinder, no kettle with adjustable temperature… tsk, tsk, tsk
I see you found a space on top of the cabinets to cast aspersions on the fridge top squatter in the comic.
Would make for an excellent hidden panel.
Pour over gang unite! It's so much easier, makes a better cup, AND it's so much easier to clean. Leave it to a Frenchman to needlessly complicate a cup of Joe, then act like it's the greatest thing since sliced snails.
I've tried several methods of preparing coffee beans.
Pour over blew my mind with its smooth taste and flavor.
My default is espresso from a machine or a moka pot.
People who use drugs first thing in the morning are weird.
I mean
broadly gestures at everything
I put ground beans in, pour hot water on them and start pressing pretty much immediately. How freakin strong do you need your coffee to wait for 4 whole minutes?
Coffee is a matter of taste. So no one should tell you that you're doing it wrong. Maybe it's just a preference.
But "immediatly" is… pretty fast. I wonder if your grind is very fine or if you have very dark beans. I don't like coffee, so I brew mine pretty cool and for 2 minutes max so I get a very cocoy drink.
If you feel like it, you may want to try different grinds and recipes. Personally I feel like it's worth it.
I won't go into details, but let's put it this way: I think what I'm doing will offend french press owners more than a paper filter.
Sounds like you are skipping the "cast judgement" step
I think it's more about taste than strength? I was a skeptic until I started trying things. still prefer a quick and dirty pour over but this is my go-to french press method
So I have an Aeropress (highly recommend because of cleaning ease) but I couldn't even wait more than a couple minutes because it will start draining through the filter almost immediately. If I waited four minutes there would be nothing to even press... Have I been doing this wrong somehow the whole time?
Pro tip - put the aeropress upside down and fill it up from the bottom, then screw on the filter, flip and into the cup it goes.
French Press: for coffee drinkers who hate coffee
Elaborate?
They're just being a coffee snob. A coffee enjoyer knows that good coffee can be made in many different ways, as long as you have good beans and a decent grinder. French press can make excellent coffee, even if it's not my preferred method.
Snobs just enjoy proving that they're better.
Anything is better than the vile brew produced by a coffee pod machine.
I cast judgement on anyone using A disgusting Fr@nch press, you should use pour over.
Comic Strips is a community for those who love comic stories.
The rules are simple:
Web of links
