I think we can agree there are large and short meters. So everyone is right.

Gas meter or water meter?

It is exactly one half of two meters.

Well, meter, like atom meter? Or like gas meter? Anti meter? You need to specify the type of meter.

bit ~~more~~ less than 6 wang lengths.

if the meter is dramatic, could be 5 feet.

Hold one arm on your body and stretch the other one to your side. Now make your wrists/hands point forward. This is a meter.

One-half a Darth Vader.

approximately 1.06 × 10⁻⁷ nanolightyears

5.618 Bananas

Five traditional sausages in a row.

About this long holds palms one meter apart.

Enough thread for 10 to 15 stitches.

3 feet + a snickers bar

Or if I feel the need to be rude toward a man: 3 feet + your penis

About 0.59 Smoots

Same length as a string.

The distance that light travels in about a three hundred millionth of a second. Wait, that's just the actual definition.

it's exactly one meter long

It's approximately 100 quarts per square foot.

One universe across, depending on your frame of reference

It takes 20s for falling cherry blossom petal to travel.

About 2 bushels and a peck.

It's more than less than a meter but less than more than a meter.