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I lost my canvasing job because I could not convince people directly complicit in genocide living extremely wealthy lives to donate $20 a month to feed the children their government is bombing.

I want to give up. I am about to run out of rent and bill money, all my savings and meager inheritance from my dead grandmother is gone. I gave almost all of it away, then I lost my job.

I don't know what to do now, my mind wanders to adventurism.

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[-] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 46 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago)

I don't know what to say other than you're one of my favorite people here, please value yourself and don't resort to adventurism. Hopefully you're just joking about that part.

Even if you don't think what you do has any impact, don't believe that. It does, it's literally impossible for you to not have an impact. You matter, you're here, and you are valuable.

You've been working hard and you're burnt out. Take a step back, find another job, recover your strength. Praxis will be there for you if and when you are ready and able. Remember that the mutual aid comm is here if you need it.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 26 points 20 hours ago

This post literally made me almost cry. Thank you.

You are also one of my favorite posters.

[-] umbrella@lemmy.ml 12 points 17 hours ago

me too thanks. felling the same.

at least find some good targets if you really decide on adventurism.

[-] AF_R@hexbear.net 6 points 15 hours ago

The supply chain industry is always hiring, entry level positions don’t require degrees, and people skills are highly desired. Unfortunately I don’t have the power to directly give you a remote job or something but feel free to reply or reach out for suggestions if you’d like some!

As the sayings go, gotta pay the bills and eat somehow. We can focus on building worldwide revolution after that.

[-] JoeByeThen@hexbear.net 6 points 13 hours ago

As the sayings go, gotta pay the bills and eat somehow. We can focus on building worldwide revolution after that.

fedposting

[-] Diva@lemmy.ml 23 points 20 hours ago

my mind wanders to adventurism.

I'm feeling you there, this month has really been awful. For me it started with losing a friend, the pain has been indescribable. Making things worse most of my spending money this month has since gone to attempting to bail out another comrade picked up by ICE since then. Fortunately my work has been blessedly stable in spite of things or I would really be starting to lose it.

Despite that stability it's been almost impossible to focus on work with the ICE gestapo hanging out in my neighborhood pretty much every day. I hope I don't end up suffering consequences for that but either way there's no end in sight and that's starting to wear on me.

I hope you manage to find something and please don't hesitate to reach out if you need help.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 14 points 19 hours ago

My grandmother's memorial was last week and I couldn't go because work. Now I am sitting in the bar at the bowling alley about to sing come out ye black and tans

[-] Diva@lemmy.ml 7 points 16 hours ago

that really sucks. I hope you can find time to grieve however you need to!

[-] chiefterror@hexbear.net 20 points 21 hours ago

Every morning I wake up, I ask myself one thing: against what or whom will I now have my revenge against society?

I have spent the majority of my life so utterly consumed by justified and highly depressive misanthropic disgust, that it's fully circled back around to cackling Pythonesque whimsy

[-] Boynomoder@hexbear.net 18 points 20 hours ago

What kind of adventures do you like to imagine going on? doggirl-grin

[-] largerfather@hexbear.net 15 points 20 hours ago
[-] Boynomoder@hexbear.net 4 points 12 hours ago

That’s a fun game.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 10 points 19 hours ago

I would make them look like a fucking liberal

[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 42 points 1 day ago

Is your local parks department hiring seasonal workers? As a stop-gap, there has never been a job I've enjoyed more. You get to do real work for your community and they're grateful for it to the point of thanking you multiple times per day. The pay sucks but it feels like the kind of job I'd do under communism.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 16 points 23 hours ago

I don't have a driver license

[-] Feinsteins_Ghost@hexbear.net 23 points 22 hours ago

Do you have state issued ID, despite it not being a driving license?

City where I've moved to usually has crews out in multiple individuals, and typically only one person is checked out to drive; on insurance, licensed etc. They hire folks with just ID here all the time.

[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 13 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 22 hours ago)

That can be a tricky circumstance but one that my local department would work around. At least here they always operate in crews of 2-4+ for safety reasons and my coworkers have no problem divvying up the driving duties. For inter-park vehicles like Toolcats, Gators, and mowers there's no license required and those are the only things non-horticulturists drive.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 9 points 21 hours ago

Oh I can drive and operate skidsteers/bobcats and all manner of heavy machinery I just don't have a license and have no intention of getting one.

[-] Hestia@hexbear.net 3 points 6 hours ago

Some places do in house certs. When I worked at Lowes it was like an hour test and then a thumbs up from the supervisor essentially

[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 12 points 21 hours ago

Already knowing those platforms is a big asset. At least here only two crews of horticulturists and the foresters require driving a road vehicle. Everyone else is based out of a maintenance shop tied to a specific park/cemetery/golf course. The interviewers might be sceptical of you not driving, but if you describe what your favourite park means to you/people you know then they'll hire you based on stewardship alone. It's very radicalising work that puts you on the frontlines of restoring the commons and the full spectrum of your community, to the point that it's the thing that has got me writing theory. Urban green space is one of those ultimate intersectional/interdisciplinary fields that makes you think.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 7 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago)

I grew up right near one of the last old growth forests in California.

I also studied ecology and evolutionary biology.

[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 2 points 1 hour ago

Any combination of those things is very competitive. Even on my horticulture crew only a third of us studied horticulture and have a real interest in it. If you can explain why it's important to protect green space then everyone you interact with there is a naive eco-Marxist who really gets what you're saying. That doesn't result in more than a $40-60k per year job with shitty benefits, but you feel really good at the end of the day.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 2 points 11 minutes ago

I have never made more tha. 28k a year

[-] Carl@hexbear.net 16 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago)

I did this once and second the idea. I specifically worked in aquatics, public pools need more people during the summer for obvious reasons, if you can swim and are fit enough for lifeguarding then all the better but I wasn't and it still helped me fill a gap in my life.

[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 9 points 22 hours ago

Our local recreation department, the ones who manage pools, seems like a great place to work. They also manage the concert halls, museums, and spots like the community farms within parks. There's so much diversity and once you're in with the city you can easily transfer wherever. I'd totally apply there if I wasn't specialised in plants.

[-] JoeByeThen@hexbear.net 2 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

cuddle

Iirc, we're both Dark Rivers of the Heart enjoyers, right? I just reread it. Koontz is very brainworms but it was still a good read.

Unrelated, this is a very good documentary.

https://archive.org/details/lucio_urtubia

[-] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 23 points 22 hours ago

You're in similar enough company. I had two family members die this year and I've drifted from a lot of my lib friends due to the genocide. My career is at least going excellent, but fucking hell I'm going batty.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 19 points 21 hours ago

I got another job interview next week, gonna try to get into being a telephone sales rep and land me an office job. I have zero experience but I am a really really good bullshitter.

[-] BountifulEggnog@hexbear.net 28 points 23 hours ago

If people were less shitty I'd be less misanthropic

[-] KatySosa@hexbear.net 11 points 20 hours ago

I hope the last line isn’t serious and it’s just an offhand remark due to your situation like I totally understand the emotional toll unemployment has but using this as the motivator to think about doing adventurism is really immature.

You do understand that it’s not just you that suffers the consequences but your family members, friends, and loved ones who are now going to be monitored by the state for as long as they’re in power?

I don’t think it’s fair to subject them to this over this insatiable urge to be martyred, I think this is an issue with a lot of people who have their ideological awakening online. Jt isn’t a healthy outlook not just as a leftist but as a person and there’s better ways you can manage the stresses you’re experiencing.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 9 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

I hope the last line isn’t serious and it’s just an offhand remark due to your situation

I wish it were

monitored by the state

Buddy this has likely been run through several state agencies. You are terribly misinformed.

[-] KatySosa@hexbear.net 9 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

I don’t understand what you mean, what has likely been run through state agencies?

Also I don’t want to encourage this behavior it’s very defeatist and counter-revolutionary and you should know better if you’re a real leftist. Money running out and being laid off aren’t good excuses to do an adventurism.

Also you strike me as someone young so if this is the case you have to understand that as you age and the more you develop and spend time doing productive things like community work and organizational work, you will be less likely to see adventurism as an option. I just think you need to be told that it’s cringe to say a certain thing for an online audience because we’re all just usernames. Please don’t do anything stupid

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 11 points 18 hours ago* (last edited 18 hours ago)

someone young

I'm pretty old compared to the average age of this community and I ain't about to do something stupid. I'm just venting. Closest thing to adventurism is just now singing come out ye black and tans at karaoke and then shouting free Palestine into the mic.

[-] KatySosa@hexbear.net 4 points 17 hours ago

I'm pretty old compared to the average age of this community

Then I think it’s your duty to set an example to the younger people who are a part of this community and not encourage adventurism even in the form of venting frustrations.

We all deal with hardships from time to time and it’s not just exclusive to you. I’d advise you edit the adventurism part from the post so people don’t get the wrong idea.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 5 points 17 hours ago

I'd think it better to leave as is so as not to alter the context of this exchange.

[-] KatySosa@hexbear.net 1 points 17 hours ago

That’s a teeny bit immature imo

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 5 points 17 hours ago
[-] KatySosa@hexbear.net 1 points 16 hours ago* (last edited 16 hours ago)

I personally would remove or edit the post with an update if I made a comment like this (alluding to committing adventurism) like I know you’ve clarified you didn’t mean it and that’s good, but I think keeping that part up is still harmful and the least you could do is make an update that it’s not serious.

I just think we make mistakes and this is one of them. I’m still sympathetic with you don’t get me wrong I just think it would be more mature of you to reconsider what you say online in regards to making vague threats. Like idk I’m nearly 30 and I would personally cringe at myself if I made a post like this lol

[-] Feinsteins_Ghost@hexbear.net 13 points 22 hours ago

I vacillate on my levels of misanthopy depending upon time of day and day of week.

Its a real thing i struggle with some times. Solidarity comrade. I dont have advice to give, and if i did it would likely suck, but i just wanted to speak up and say i empathize with you.

[-] AfricanExpansionist@lemmy.ml 14 points 1 day ago

Have you considered teaching English in South Korea?

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 21 points 1 day ago

I would love to be a teacher of some kind but I know not a lick of Korean

[-] spectre@hexbear.net 14 points 23 hours ago

You definitely don't need to know the language to he an overseas English teacher. Definitely definitely not. You do need a 4 year degree.

As a comrade, I do require you to learn the language when you get there, but that isn't an obstacle to you getting overseas int he first place.

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 13 points 23 hours ago

I don't know if I am going to currently survive another 4 years let alone be able to go back to school

[-] spectre@hexbear.net 12 points 23 hours ago

My bad was hoping that part might be out of the way for you :/

[-] AfricanExpansionist@lemmy.ml 11 points 23 hours ago

You don't need to

Lots of hagwon jobs go unfilled outside of Seoul metro area.

It's a good deal to get back on your feet financially, but it can be a little bumpy transitioning to a new culture and lifestyle, and the wage gains have unfortunately gone to instead pay for the rising cost of rent. But you can have an awesome social life.

I do recommend finding a smaller city or Jeju. Your money will go further than in Seoul. It's VERY worth looking into. If you're more adventurous, Vietnam seems to be the hot TEFL spot these days and I guess the money goes further there, but Korea offers a lot in terms of lifestyle and established foreign community

[-] CrookedSerpent@hexbear.net 6 points 22 hours ago

Why are you feeling people who don't like you on general principle????

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 10 points 22 hours ago

wtf I never said that most people love me lol

[-] CrookedSerpent@hexbear.net 14 points 21 hours ago

I was making a joke cuz you can interpret "I'm feeling very misanthropic folks" as you saying you are literally feeling people who are misanthropic. It's funny, laugh. Now. B)

[-] BeamBrain@hexbear.net 4 points 22 hours ago

I know the feeling. This Tom Paxton song [CW for n-word] has never been more relevant in my lifetime.

[-] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 1 points 21 hours ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

this post was submitted on 23 May 2025
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