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[-] LastYearsIrritant@sopuli.xyz 1 points 43 minutes ago

Probably go straight to jail.

If the whole world has been watching my every move my entire life, then the cops have everything they need to put me away for a long time.

That's assuming the real world operates on even remotely the same rules as this one.

Go on TV for paid interviews.

[-] IvyisAngy@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago

Cry Tears of fucking joy that the news was fake and to cause drama.

...And then try to find and strangle whoever decided to make stressful, boring hell.

[-] fakasad68@lemmy.ml 3 points 5 hours ago

Wait why was this recommended to me? Am I actually in the Truman show and this is some sort of hint that is telling me to break out?

[-] NightmareQueenJune@lemmy.world 1 points 1 hour ago

All of the above.

[-] B0rax@feddit.org 3 points 3 hours ago
[-] B0rax@feddit.org 3 points 3 hours ago
[-] B0rax@feddit.org 3 points 3 hours ago

We are not allowed to tell you

[-] Delphia@lemmy.world 1 points 4 hours ago

Bang every crazy groupie that wants a piece.

[-] HatchetHaro@pawb.social 1 points 6 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago)
  1. stabilize my living situation; my life has just been upended, but there will for sure be many, many people who would help me integrate into society, whether it be housing, jobs, education, etc.

  2. use my fame to gain wealth; either sue the show producers, or reach an agreement for a big paycheck. then, partner with hella companies for interviews, photoshoots, product endorsements, whatever. write my own biography.

  3. make season 2, starring me on a new island, new characters, new story. the producers would pay me big bucks for that shit. milk the franchise for all its worth.

[-] hyacin@lemmy.ml 2 points 19 hours ago

hooker coke orgy

[-] jeffreyd@lemmy.today 15 points 1 day ago

Die of embarrassment at how many times the world watched me rub my balls then smell my fingers.

[-] cone_zombie@lemmy.ml 2 points 9 hours ago

'laugh track'

[-] root@lemmy.world 26 points 1 day ago
[-] HubertManne@piefed.social 7 points 1 day ago
[-] LowResBeer@lemmy.ml 10 points 1 day ago

Jork it crazy style

[-] iusearchbtw@feddit.uk 11 points 1 day ago
[-] Archangel1313@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 day ago

Cypher was right all along.

[-] sauerkrautsaul@lemmus.org 2 points 1 day ago

but like put me back in successful like, like make me a detroit restraunt ownah!!! not some shlubby dinah, like a steak house that tech guys go tah!!

[-] SmokeInFog@midwest.social 13 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Who knows? Like, the world is very different from how it's been presented to me if that's the case. Corporations can own people and feed them highly produced gas lighting false realities? I'd be terrified. In the reality presented to me we're on the brink of another world war. If that's not real but there other is, then it sounds like the bad guys won a long time ago.

[-] bizarroland@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

I honestly think I would have an incredibly difficult time going from being a virtual nobody, in my own opinion, to being the greatest celebrity in the world.

Billions of people had watched almost every moment of my life, all of the highs, all of the lows.

There's probably over a million people on the planet that know me better than I know myself.

There's probably several million people on the planet that know me better than they know themselves.

The instant celebrity, the instant stardom, the constant hammering for appearance fees, and the urge to put me into movies, the offers to put me into porn, people who want to get drunk with me, do drugs with me, who worship the ground I walk on everywhere I go, no matter where I go, would likely drive me mad.

Not to mention the lawyers beating down my door with offers to sue the corporation that bought me as a child, as an infant, as a sperm and egg, and then televised every moment of my existence throughout my entire life against my will.

The politicians who want me to endorse them so that they can ride my coat tails into a certainty of election.

It would honestly drive me bonkers.

But I wouldn't mind watching an anime based off of that or a TV show.

"Life after Truman".

Come on, like it would be so entertaining to see all the different ways creative people could deal with that concept.

[-] GuyFawkes@midwest.social 5 points 1 day ago

Jack off in private

[-] ArgumentativeMonotheist@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Just move somewhere in the global South where the show isn't broadcast/as popular and I'd be just another white man, and try to start over?

[-] ZiggyTheZygote@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 day ago

I would hunt down the people who put me in that situation and everyone who was in on it and burn them alive.

[-] blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 day ago

Suicide.

Being that age I doubt I'd  be able to integrate into society.

[-] GiorgioPerlasca@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 day ago

Integrate into society is not necessary to live a happy life. Writers, composers, painters, mathematicians often did not live integrated into a society.

this post was submitted on 18 Jan 2026
19 points (100.0% liked)

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