I still use them exclusively lol

I only use wired. Batteries and charging suck.

Wired vs. wireless is whatever works for you, but no one misses balled mice. No one.

I prefer wired accessories. They don't need to be charged, and I don't have to worry about them having connection issues.

Relying on batteries is for suckas

I did a support call in the 90's where "clicking the left mouse button" was stumping her. After trying a few variations of instructions, I decided to take a step back and better assess the situation.

Me - Ma'am, are you left or right handed?

Her: right

Me: Lift your right hand, and look at the mouse. It should be a palm sized white plastic device with two buttons, one on the left and one on the right where your fingers rest. There should also be a small cable that extends from the far side and plugs into your computer. The underside of it has a little grey ball in the middle. Do you see it?

Her: You mean the doohickey on the floor?

Me: Pardon me?!? Well, it should be on your desk, not the floor. Why would it be down there?

Her: You mean the foot pedal?

Me: *light bulb clicks on. Are you really familiar with sewing machines?

Her: yes, but this doesn't work anything like that.

Me: ok. We have found the problem! This is great. First step is to take the foot pedal off the floor and place it on the desk, under your right hand when you are sitting comfortably.

From there everything went smooth as silk.

I once had a support call where I told the customer to click the Start button and they didn't know what it was. I clarified by saying that it was the button in the corner of the screen. They did it and then said that their entire screen turned black.

Apparently they'd pushed the power button on their monitor.

I can hear this image.

It doesn't have fur so it's a naked mole rat

You know what doesn't have a tail? A guinea pig.

Strange word we live in where he is more right than wrong