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I finally figured out how to track window velocity, so I used user32.dll to forcefully unclick my mouse and shatter the UI as a "punishment". (programming.dev)
submitted 5 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago) by FunnyCoder@programming.dev to c/programmer_humor@programming.dev
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[-] FreshLight@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

I'm installing the 2$ version on my grandparent's computer.

[-] FunnyCoder@programming.dev 2 points 1 hour ago

Grandpa: "Dear, why did my Excel spreadsheet just turn into glass and scream at me?" 💀

[-] Sanctus@anarchist.nexus 19 points 3 hours ago

Brb throwing this into my group policy at work

[-] janus2@lemmy.zip 15 points 1 hour ago

How To Convince Your Boss To Ditch Windows

[-] FunnyCoder@programming.dev 5 points 1 hour ago

Just tell your boss it’s a mandatory Windows 11 'Surface Tension' update. If the windows didn't break, how would you know they're made of glass? OwO

[-] FunnyCoder@programming.dev 2 points 1 hour ago

I am not responsible for any 'Update your Resume' meetings that result from this. But if you do it, please record the reaction of the first person who shatters their Outlook. ヾ(•ω•`)o

[-] FunnyCoder@programming.dev 41 points 5 hours ago

I’ve been practicing my "API Abuse" skills and created a desktop toy that gives your windows "fragility" consequences.

The Cursed Technical Details Areeeee:

  • The Mouse Thief: To prevent a "teleportation" bug when the window shatters, I’m using user32.dll to send a MOUSEEVENTF_LEFTUP signal. It literally prys the window out of your hand if you drag it too fast.
  • The Snapshot: It uses DwmGetWindowAttribute to find the exact frame bounds (ignoring those invisible Windows shadows) , takes a screen capture, and replaces the real window with a WPF PhysicsCanvas.
  • The Physics: Each shard is a Polygon shape with its own VelocityY (gravity) and RotationSpeed.

The Chaos (Warning: LOUD Audio): The GIF is silent, but I recorded a short demo with "m e m e" sound here: https://youtube.com/shorts/9bTcgtLpOXQ

The Project Page: If you want to break your own desktop, I put a free lite version on Itch. It also supports custom .wav modding if you want to swap the sounds for your own stuff. https://erza-lotus-arcane.itch.io/please-drag-me-gently

[-] LiveLM@lemmy.zip 32 points 5 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago)

Lmaooo insanely high quality shitpost

[-] FunnyCoder@programming.dev 24 points 5 hours ago

Thanks lol! I spent way too much time reading old Win32 documentation just to make a joke app, so I'm glad the "API abuse" is being appreciated yike. 〒▽〒

this post was submitted on 09 Apr 2026
128 points (98.5% liked)

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