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submitted 1 week ago by JTT@feddit.org to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world

"Before Dr. Brian Christine was tapped to lead America’s public hantavirus response, he was an Alabama-based urologist who specialized in penile implants, CNN reported Friday.

Christine currently serves as the assistant secretary for health at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, and as such is one of the top public health officials running the country’s infectious disease policy. Earlier this week, he told reporters in Nebraska that the agency’s response to the dangerous outbreak would be “grounded in science” and “grounded in transparency.”

Yet Christine’s resume seems far and away from that of a typical U.S. health official. While he has some public health experience under his belt, having served as a four-star admiral in the U.S. Public Health Service Commissioned Corps, he has also espoused dangerous far-right beliefs and spread wellness conspiracy theories.

He rebuked coronavirus mandates and spread conspiracy theories about treatment plans that sowed doubt and division over the government’s public health response at the time. He has claimed that the pandemic was a part of a wider government plot to control people, and he skirted questions from the U.S. Senate as to whether or not he would recommend the Covid vaccine to his patients.

The 62-year-old admiral also hosted a YouTube series titled “Erection Connection,” a professional show for other urologists discussing erectile dysfunction..."

top 36 comments
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[-] Formfiller@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago

Dude I swear to fucking god if we don’t have a revolution we deserve to go extinct

[-] osanna@lemmy.vg -3 points 1 week ago
[-] CultLeader4Hire@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago

A one person revolution is called suicide by cop

[-] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 11 points 1 week ago

They are just playing with us all, as they prepare to snuff us all out within a handful of years.

Because we aren't guillotining them.

[-] zergtoshi@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago

I wonder how they know each other.
Does anyone have a clue?

[-] victorz@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

Did they say it was his personal penile impaler? Penis impostor? Dick driver?

Let's start some rumors y'all. Liberal application of fiction.

[-] emmanuel_car@k.fe.derate.me 4 points 1 week ago

Not fiction, alternative facts

[-] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 9 points 1 week ago

must be the same DR that botched MUSK's penis enlargement surgery.

[-] 6stringringer@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 week ago

Bruh got’s to work off all the F ups he done did. He ain’t getting paid. Mf’er just tryna stay alive rn.

[-] agingelderly@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

He rebuked coronavirus mandates and spread conspiracy theories about treatment plans that sowed doubt and division over the government’s public health response at the time. He has claimed that the pandemic was a part of a wider government plot to control people, and he skirted questions from the U.S. Senate as to whether or not he would recommend the Covid vaccine to his patients.

Boom he's a piece of shit. Get him out. This moron shouldn't be anywhere near a medical decision.

[-] Asafum@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

That is one hell of a way of telling us to get fucked. Takes a bit of thought to get there, 4/10 joke.

Next up: Ivermectin and penis enlargement prevents hantavirus!

[-] Fredselfish@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

Probably Trump personally doctor. We all know Trump has a small Dick.

[-] Kazumara@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 1 week ago

Why even assign a hantavirus official? Just for stoking fears and using them politically? It's not like a pandemic is looming.

[-] SabinStargem@lemmy.today 4 points 1 week ago

Presumably, the same guy who botched Elon's junk. It must grate, seeing this doctor whenever visiting the Orange House.

[-] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 2 points 1 week ago

and likely made sexually frustrated and more "conservative"

[-] Treczoks@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

Trump likes to assign such jobs to people he knows. Go figure.

[-] Nomad@infosec.pub 3 points 1 week ago

The word you are looking for is crony capitalism.

[-] smeenz@lemmy.nz 2 points 1 week ago

Actually, he's got a great pool guy who he has never heard of, at all, and definitely didn't have anything to do with giving him a contract to paint the reflecting pool

[-] MisterD@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 week ago

I vaguely remember someone mentioning that both Trump and Epstein had deformed penises. I thought it was b.s. but now I'm not sure.

Why else would he want to reward a penis implant specialist?

[-] FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

And this headline doesn't even crack the top 10 of the worst things Donald has done.

[-] RobotToaster@mander.xyz 3 points 1 week ago

On the one hand urology and ED are important specialisms, and it's annoying seeing them mocked. He also actually has experience in public health which makes him more qualified than most trump appointees.

On the other hand, outside of that his record is, for want of a better term, "yikes".

[-] SethTaylor@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

That's one way of telling people to get fucked

Americans: "But, sir, there's a pandemic" Trump: "Fetch me my dick doctor"

[-] Infinite@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 week ago

So they actually think it's hentaivirus?

[-] CannedYeet@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

Gotta share this story of the horror of penis enlargements gone wrong

https://www.propublica.org/article/penis-enlargement-enhancement-procedures-implants

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

I mean I know a country whose top epidemiologist isn't even a doctor (I only know that because I'm related to the idiot)

[-] Murse@slrpnk.net 1 points 1 week ago

Got tired of getting penises up, so he switched to getting infection rates up instead.

[-] Darthcapi@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 week ago

Why can’t we just have nice things?

[-] Asafum@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

Because there are too many greedy people with exploded egos that have the highest propensity to do whatever it takes to hold positions of power, meanwhile "good" people rarely seek, or are capable of obtaining, positions of power.

:(

[-] OwOarchist@pawb.social 0 points 1 week ago

Because ~40% of our voter base HATES nice things and consistently votes to hurt and punish nice things. And, worst of all, those people are concentrated in low-population states, which our profoundly stupid electoral system gives far more representation to.

[-] teyrnon@sh.itjust.works 0 points 1 week ago

That is a very incomplete Take. As if the Democrats were blameless. To make that argument after to say nothing before them, Clinton, obama, clinton, biden, then Harris without even a contest with 4 months to go.

The fact of the matter, all major parties in all Western Nations have been seized by the oligarchy. The only answer is to take one of those parties back and run a populist campaign, to make and run a political machine. But that's not in the cards because you (collective, not you neccessarily,) mother fuckers trust these fake leftists to run the opposition.

[-] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 1 points 1 week ago

many far right parties all over the world is primarly funded by putin anyways, it is not accident the sudden amount propaganda propping up them all at once. Billionaires are only taking advantage of what russia has lead the way.

[-] JackiesFridge@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

So dude’s previous medical experience was…gender-affirming care.

[-] 6stringringer@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 week ago

If one gets Penis Hantavirus. Well, they are gonna have a really bad time.

[-] Malyca@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 week ago

On the other hand, maybe we'll all die of hantavirus before having to suffer through the rest of the fascist takeover

[-] fubarx@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

The right person to prevent it from getting out-of-hand.

[-] BenLeMan@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

Glad the Health Secretary has his expertise augmented by someone specializing in human penises.

He is, though, isn't he? Right? God, I hope he's not just another raccoon penis enthusiast.

this post was submitted on 15 May 2026
79 points (98.8% liked)

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