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I know what you're doing! (startrek.website)
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[-] pseudonym 82 points 11 months ago

Dog ownership is hearing a gag from the dead of sleep and launching out of bed to move the dog to the bathroom before she vomits on the carpet

[-] Kioga@lemmy.world 76 points 11 months ago

This is also cat ownership. :(

It’s hard getting back to sleep with all the adrenaline flowing.

[-] MarmaladeMermaid@lemm.ee 16 points 11 months ago

I have a dust pan, like for sweeping, that I keep by the bed, I stick maxi pads to the flat part and use it to catch the barfs. Much easier than moving the horking cat.

[-] Afghaniscran@feddit.uk 20 points 11 months ago

This only works if you don't have a cat that turns his head at the last second to avoid the vomit catching device.

[-] idunnololz@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

Yeah why does my cat refuse to vomit on the floor and always does it on the carpet?!

[-] Afghaniscran@feddit.uk 3 points 11 months ago

My only guess is that cats are disrespectful arseholes. That's why I like them though.

[-] danielbln@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Ours is polite enough to only ever hurl onto surfaces that are easily cleaned.

[-] smackjack@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Just get yourself a carpet cleaner. Bissell makes some good ones.

[-] ReiRose@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Is my cat broken? He doesn't vomit.

[-] PugJesus@kbin.social 20 points 11 months ago

"HURP. HURP. HURP. HURP."

"OH JESUS CHRIST NO NO NO INTO THE KITCHEN PLEASE"

[-] Alteon@lemmy.world 27 points 11 months ago

We've got a husky that views this as a "middle of the night" snack. He hears that "Hurp, Hurp" sound and IMMEDIATELY runs over to where the cat is. Full run at 2am He wants to be the first to savor the delicious hair sausage.

[-] TheCrispyDud@kbin.social 11 points 11 months ago

Well the phrase hair sausage is going on the list of fucking awful now.

[-] aksdb@feddit.de 8 points 11 months ago

Where was that phrase before?

[-] TheCrispyDud@kbin.social 9 points 11 months ago

Thankfully nowhere near me until today.

[-] vaquedoso@lemmy.world 9 points 11 months ago

What a terrible day to have eyes

[-] Sotuanduso@lemm.ee 10 points 11 months ago

Does it ever work?

[-] ares35@kbin.social 5 points 11 months ago

moments earlier, the cat hacked-up a hairball on the rug between the bed and bathroom for you to keep your feet warm with.

[-] xkforce@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

This is also cat ownership

[-] paultimate14@lemmy.world 39 points 11 months ago

Butter Packaging: Keep Refrigerated

Utterly deranged people: I'm gonna pretend I didn't see that

[-] pimento64@sopuli.xyz 13 points 11 months ago

he doesn't have a French butter dish

[-] Bonehead@kbin.social 11 points 11 months ago

Small amounts of butter is perfectly fine to leave at room temperature...but only if it's salted. Unsalted butter will grow mold quickly, but salt will inhibit mold growth for quite a while. Unfortunately exposure to light and oxygen will cause it to turn rancid after 2 days, but it's technically still edible.

[-] TheSlad@sh.itjust.works 10 points 11 months ago

I keep unsalted butter at room temp in a butter dish just fine.

[-] Faresh@lemmy.ml 3 points 11 months ago

I'm surprised modern salted butter has enough salt for that. Salted butter in the past was salty to the point of being inedible unless washed AFAIK.

[-] FooBarrington@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago

That's why I take my butter with me when stepping into the morning shower. Saves water, and you can snack a bit!

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[-] samus12345@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago

Refrigerated butter: hard as a rock

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[-] Limeey@lemmy.world 14 points 11 months ago

My cat is deaf and so you have to get up, EVERYTIME

[-] 567PrimeMover@kbin.social 12 points 11 months ago

Ours will jump onto the counter, and you can hear her because her back legs hit the cabinet door on her way up.

She knows she's being bad too, because I'd hear her jump, go pick her off the counter, and set her somewhere else. Now, I'll go to get her and she'll be sitting on the floor like "What? I wasn't doing anything!"

[-] quinkin@lemmy.world 12 points 11 months ago

Parenting. It's quiet... Too quiet.

[-] hakunawazo@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

The preview looked promising ;)

[-] BleatingZombie@lemmy.world 7 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

"nip is hearing a sin across the house WITH A BUTT"

[-] Strobelt@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

FROM THE BUTT*

[-] JCreazy@midwest.social 9 points 11 months ago

Not keeping butter in the refrigerator...

[-] GBU_28@lemm.ee 24 points 11 months ago

Bulk butter lives in the fridge. This week's butter lives on the counter in the dish designed for it, with the cover.

[-] doingthestuff@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Yes, the cover is essential, especially if you have a cat. Our winters are so cold here, even the butter on the counter isn't at all soft.

[-] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 11 months ago
[-] AnxiousOtter@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago

I like money more than I like cranking the heat up.

[-] Maalus@lemmy.world 16 points 11 months ago

Yeah, so? A lot of people here do that, you don't have to spread hard butter on soft bread. It doesn't go bad because usually it's eaten quickly and covered with a glass lid or something

[-] doingthestuff@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Also salted butter lasts longer on the counter than unsalted, and temperature is a factor. And salted butter makes delicious eggs!

[-] ReiRose@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Catflap on the fridge

[-] ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

As your neighbour in the apartment complex, I hear this too often and I wonder.

Just, out of blue. Completely quiet, then another butter fight.

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 4 points 11 months ago

My butter dish has a lid that animals shouldn't be able to open. Though I have my doubts it would hold up to a dog or a bear if they really wanted some butter.

[-] Caesium@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

our cat knew there was butter under the lid so she tried to do the paw thing to like nudge it open

but she just knocked it on the ground instead and broke the butter dish we had for 20+ years :(

[-] Darkassassin07@lemmy.ca 4 points 11 months ago

That's the 'clink' sound; the lid being moved. (or at least attempts to move it)

[-] Emerald@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Image Transcription: Twitter Post


they/themily, @e_davishale

cat ownership is hearing a single soft *clink* from across the house and yelling GET AWAY FROM THE BUTTER

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this post was submitted on 14 Dec 2023
839 points (98.7% liked)

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