i have a few non-overlapping friend groups with a lot of trans fems, one of which says bro to each other constantly and is definitely not representative of my other friends or anyone else.
I think it's largely a cultural thing. Growing up and still today, girls (and guys) in my area will call guys and girls "dude", "bro", "bitch", the n word, "girl", "hoe", etc. If someone told me to not call them dude or bro, I'd stop because I don't want to make people uncomfortable. But to me most of the words I mentioned are gender neutral terms.
There is some masculine default sneaking in there some of the time in how we got here, but it's also distinct from languages where you gender-conjugate even if there's only one man in a group of mostly women because you'll hear "hey guys" etc addressing zero men.
Oh yeah no doubt the reason some of those terms are “gender neutral” is because it’s originally for males. Similarly to how male marketed clothing is acceptable for females to wear - like almost nobody bats an eye - thus it becomes largely “gender neutral.” But then the opposite makes reactionaries foam at the mouth.
Okay but give me an actually woke Batman. Have all the memorable villains and the police team up to kill Bruce Wayne, weirdo rich socialist, and Woke Batman, weirdo capitalist killer/cop killer.
woke batman (in his fake persona bruce wayne) invites all the capitalists of gotham to davos and then detonates a bomb.
bruce wayne is engles, batman is a direct-action marx
batman kills the wayne co-op's competitors and they buy them up for cheap
"acab includes your dad" and babs kills jim
Woker: Hehehe Woke Batman, I identify as "anything Woke Batman does not identify me as"
Woke Batman: Just because I won't misgender you, doesn't mean I have to gender you correctly" leaves The Woker to die in train crash
Tbh, I like the supposed "Socialist Batman" of the, well, recent Batman movie.
Granted, there was copaganda in that movie, but I do like "Socialist Batman" and wish he were the common interpretation of the character more often.
Otherwise, the alternative is just Batman, say, allowing the Green Lantern to punch a lady and Batman giving him the thumbs-up because... he's the goddamn Batman, he doesn't care about that shit! /s
¯_(ツ)_/¯
Shrug with missing arm is kinda nostaligic, probably havent seen it since pre-covid
tru
What recent Batman movie? Because the 2022 "The Batman" was definitely not socialist lol.
It wasn't, but some people called it that and I kinda like the nickname lol
you won't miss fuknslammer?
im sorry i fogor slammer i will report to the reeducation camp
I thought "bro" was gender neutral, like "dude" or "boyz".
I don't think many trans people think dude is gender neutral.
My go to when cis guys say it is has always been "Do you fuck dudes then?"
More often than not trans people put up with it among friend groups purely because they've been terrorised into not complaining out of fear of losing the few social groups they have left, giving the false impression to some who "have a trans friend that's ok with it" that it's fine, when in reality they quietly would prefer otherwise.
My go to when cis guys say it is has always been "Do you fuck dudes then?"
Yes.
Yes that's fine but most of these people aren't gay/bi lmao
I'm bi but mostly date women.
But I used to call my most serious ex "dude" all the time
My go to when cis guys say it is has always been "Do you fuck dudes then?"
i used to know a dude i was interested in but they were aro/ace so there's some subset of dudes i'd be into but my partner attraction is heavily informed by typical secondary characteristics and i'm agender myself so i'm not even sure how to usefully label my orientation.
I would address my cis-afab partner and her girlfriends sat at a table as "hey dudes" some portion of the time instead of "hey guys", so you tell me if that means i was fucking a dude. i'm not a language doctor but it seems like some usages are contextually gender neutral and others aren't.
some usages are contextually gender neutral and others aren't
I can agree with this. Issue is that, for trans people that are also a little twitchy about it, those contextually gender-neutral situations lose their contextual neutrality.
and of course it can be use aggressively to invalidate, like neutral pronouns.
i would assume this is a bit but the he/him pronouns make me concerned it might not be
edit: okay the "boyz" makes me err on the side of this being a bit lol
I'm not doing a bit, being genuine. I have would assume Phrases like "me and the boyz" being gender natural, I assume it's meant to be read as "me and my dumb friends".
I would assume dude/bro to be gender natural as well they seem to be applied to everyone. He/She/They/Them, the works.
Again just asking, not trying to be obtuse or weird or anything.
It's all cool! It's important to consider the hegemonic reasons for why 'dude' and 'bro' might be considered gender neutral. Referring to someone as a man has become so common among men that it sometimes gets spread around. This pattern though really only happens in communities that are predominately male. There's also a major transmisogynist element: men will often say that they employ 'dude' and 'bro' in a gender neutral fashion but in fact don't direct it towards cis women, and only call trans women and other men 'dude.' As another note, I used to hang out with a lot of AFAB nonbinary people and they never really used phrases like that, so I would say it's a phenomenon really exclusive to men.
I know a lot of trans women who do consider being called 'dude' misgendering. I'm personally Fine with it (and calling people dude isn't a habit I've fully purged from myself) so I don't judge people too harshly for doing it, but being constantly referred to as one of 'the boys' makes playing multiplayer games really frustrating for me. Repeated misgendering is the reason why I really stopped playing multiplayer games with random people.
I know a lot of trans women who do consider being called 'dude' misgendering. I'm personally Fine with it (and calling people dude isn't a habit I've fully purged from myself) so I don't judge people too harshly for doing it, but being constantly referred to as one of 'the boys' makes playing multiplayer games really frustrating for me. Repeated misgendering is the reason why I really stopped playing multiplayer games with random people.
I see what you’re saying now. I feel you (not the corny liberal “I see you I hear you”, but in the comradely “I gotchu” sense). Appreciate you being cool with your explanation. I see where you’re coming from, I'll think this of this sort thing when talking to the trans friends.
I wouldn't consider any of those to be gender neutral tbh
Being called dude or bro genuinely bothers the fuck out of me. I will speak up about it if called either or.
The person who used to be my friend would adamantly defend me when I was misgendered, because I never spoke up for myself. They also called me ‘dude’ constantly which I tbh found very endearing and adorable. Sometimes they would call me ‘man’ in rare contexts; it was always texts that started out ‘Hey man.’ It was funny.
And now nobody calls me that. 😿
chapotraphouse
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